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<random> Ash (Bruce Campbell): Alright you Primitive Screwheads, listen up! You see this? This... is my boomstick! The twelve-gauge double-barreled Remington. S-Mart's top of the line. You can find this in the sporting goods department. That's right, this sweet baby was made in Grand Rapids, Michigan. Retails for about a hundred and nine, ninety five. It's got a walnut stock, cobalt blue steel, and a hair trigger. That's right. Shop smart. Shop S-Mart. You got that? --Army of Darkness @@@ Tank (Marcus Chong): So what do you need? Besides a miracle. Neo (Keanu Reeves): Guns. Lots of guns. --The Matrix @@@ Captain Danny Walker (Josh Hartnett): We've got broomsticks for tailguns! Captain Rafe McCawley (Ben Affleck): Maybe it'll scare 'em. --Pearl Harbor @@@ Maj. General William Deveraux (Bruce Willis): Twelve hours after the President gives the order we can be on the ground. One light infantry division of 10,700 men, elements of the Rapid Deployment Force, Special Forces, Delta, APCs, helicopters, tanks and of course the ubiquitous M16A1 assault rifle. A humble enough weapon until you see it in the hands of a man outside your local bowling alley or 7-11. It will be noisy, it will be scary and it will not be mistaken for a VFW parade. --The Siege @@@ Dr. Jack Ryan (Alec Baldwin): [to himself] "Ryan, some things in here don't react well to bullets." Yeah, like me. I don't react well to bullets. --The Hunt for Red October @@@ Staff Sergeant Matt Eversmann (Josh Hartnett): Conserve your ammo, only shoot at what you can hit. --Black Hawk Down @@@ Captain Mike Steele (Jason Isaacs): Anyone comes through this door, you give 'em one in the head and two in the chest, got it? --Black Hawk Down @@@ Ash (Bruce Campbell): Good, bad, I'm the guy with the gun. --Army of Darkness @@@ U.S. Deputy Marshal Sam Gerard (Tommy Lee Jones): I noticed on the boat you finally went with the Glock. Agent John Royce (Robert Downey Jr.): Yeah, Glock .40, just like yours. --U.S. Marshals @@@ Burt Gummer (Michael Gross): I am completely out of ammo! That's never happened to me before. --Tremors 2: Aftershocks @@@ Tony Montana (Al Pacino): Say hello to my little friend! --Scarface @@@ Jericho Cane (Arnold Schwarzenegger): Between your faith and my Glock nine millimeter, I take my Glock. --End of Days @@@ The Terminator (Arnold Schwarzenegger): Twelve gauge autoloader. Pawn Shop Clerk (Dick Miller): That's Italian. It can go pump, or auto. The Terminator: The .45 Long Slide, with laser sighting. Pawn Shop Clerk: These are brand new; we just got them in. That's a good gun. Just touch the trigger, the beam comes on and you put the red dot where you want the bullet to go. You can't miss. Anything else? The Terminator: Phased-plasma rifle in the forty watt range. Pawn Shop Clerk: Hey, just what you see, pal. The Terminator: Uzi nine millimeter. Pawn Shop Clerk: You know your weapons, buddy! Any of these is ideal for home defense. So...which will it be? The Terminator: All. Pawn Shop Clerk: I may close early today. --The Terminator @@@ Cop (Rick Gomez): You eyeballing my piece, 50 Cent? You wanna go? Make something happen. Do it. 'Cause I promise you I will bust you up. Sam Witwicky (Shia LaBeouf): Are you on drugs? --Transformers @@@ Billy Clanton (Thomas Haden Church): Why, it's the drunk piano player. You're so drunk, you can't hit nothin'. In fact, you're probably seeing double. Doc Holliday (Val Kilmer): I have two guns, one for each of ya. --Tombstone @@@ Mr. White (Harvey Keitel): If you shoot this man, you die next. Repeat. if you shoot this man, you die next. --Reservoir Dogs @@@ Heavy Weapons Guy (Gary Schwartz): I am Heavy Weapons Guy, and this is my weapon. She weighs one hundred and fifty kilograms and fires two hundred dollar custom two cartridges at ten thousand rounds per minute. It costs four hundred thousand dollars to fire this weapon for twelve seconds. --Team Fortress 2 @@@ Heavy Weapons Guy (Gary Schwartz): Oh my god, who touched Sasha? Alright... Who touched my gun!? --Team Fortress 2 @@@ Heavy Weapons Guy (Gary Schwartz): Some people think they can outsmart me. Maybe... maybe. I've yet to meet one that can outsmart bullet. --Team Fortress 2 @@@ Scout (Nathan Vetterlein): Four hundred thousand dollars to fire that gun, huh? Yeah, money well spent! --Team Fortress 2 @@@ Scout (Nathan Vetterlein): Them two hundred dollar bullets ain't so hot when they don't hit nothin', are they? --Team Fortress 2 @@@ @@@ Eddie (Nick Moran): They're armed. Soap (Dexter Fletcher): What was that? Armed? What do you mean armed? Armed with what? Eddie: Err, bad breath, colorful language, feather duster... what do you think they're gonna be armed with? Guns, you tit! --Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels @@@ Dog (Frank Harper): What the f**k is that? Mickey (Ronnie Fox): It's me Bren Gun. Dog: Couldn't you have thought of something more practical? --Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels @@@ Gunnery Sergeant Hartman (R. Lee Ermey): The deadliest weapon in the world is a marine and his rifle. --Full Metal Jacket @@@ Private Leonard "Gomer Pyle" Lawrence (Vincent D'Onofrio): Seven-six-two millimeter. Full. Metal. Jacket. --Full Metal Jacket @@@ Jules (Samuel L. Jackson): We should have shotguns for this kind of deal. --Pulp Fiction @@@ Gunnery Sergeant Thomas Highway (Clint Eastwood): This is the AK-47 assault rifle, the preferred weapon of your enemy, and it makes a very distinctive sound when fired at you, so remember it. --Heartbreak Ridge @@@ Dwight (Clive Owen): (narrating) Where to fight counts for a lot... Manute (Michael Clarke Duncan): Cute trick, McCarthy... but it will do you no good... Dwight: But there's nothing like having your friends show up... With lotsa guns... --Sin City @@@ Lt. 2nd Grade Greg Velasquez (Reg E. Cathey): Suspects appear to be wearing tactical clothing and have automatic weapons. --S.W.A.T. @@@ Yuri Orlov (Nicolas Cage): Of all the weapons in the vast Soviet arsenal, nothing was more profitable than Avtomat Kalashnikova model of nineteen forty-seven. More commonly known as the AK-47, or Kalashnikov. It's the world's most popular assault rifle. A weapon all fighters love. An elegantly simple nine-pound amalgamation of forged steel and plywood. It doesn't break, jam, or overheat. It'll shoot whether it's covered in mud or filled with sand. It's so easy, even a child can use it; and they do. The Soviets put the gun on a coin. Mozambique put it on their flag. Since the end of the Cold War, the Kalashnikov has become the Russian people's greatest export. After that comes vodka, caviar, and suicidal novelists. One thing is for sure: No one was lining up to buy their cars. --Lord of War @@@ Hicks (Michael Biehn): I like to keep this handy *pumps shotgun*...for close encounters. --Aliens @@@ Dominic (Rupert Graves): What do you think will happen? Finch (Stephen Rea): What usually happens when people without guns stand up to people with guns. --V for Vendetta @@@ William Munny (Clint Eastwood): I see you still have that Spencer rifle. Ned Logan (Morgan Freeman): Yeah... And I can still knock the eye off a bird flyin' too. --Unforgiven @@@ Garrett Lawton (Donald Sutherland): Guns, guns, guns, wheee! --Hollow Point @@@ Joe/The Man With No Name (Clint Eastwood): When a man with a .45 meets a man with a rifle, you said, the man with a pistol's a dead man. Let's see if that's true. Go ahead, load up and shoot. --A Fistful of Dollars @@@ Frank Castle (Thomas Jane): Your 1911 Colts, you've done something to them. Frank Castle Sr. (Roy Scheider): Yeah, I bored the chambers, customized the triggers, and added some compensators. They used to be pretty good; now they're nail drivers. --The Punisher (2004) @@@ Det. Harry Callahan (Clint Eastwood): I know what you're thinking. "Did he fire six shots or only five?" Well, to tell you the truth, in all this excitement, I kind of lost track myself. But being as this is a .44 Magnum, the most powerful handgun in the world, and would blow your head clean off, you've got to ask yourself one question; "Do I feel lucky?" Well, do ya, punk? --Dirty Harry @@@ Superintendent Pang (Philip Chan): Give a guy a gun, he thinks he's Superman. Give him two and he thinks he's God! --Hard Boiled @@@ Bullet Tooth Tony (Vinnie Jones): So, you are obviously the big dick. The men on the side of ya are your balls. Now there are two types of balls. There are big brave balls, and there are little mincey faggot balls. Now, dicks have drive and clarity of vision, but they are not clever. They smell pussy and they want a piece of the action. And you thought you smelled some good old pussy, and have brought your two little mincey faggot balls along for a good old time. But you've got your parties muddled up. There's no pussy here, just a dose that'll make you wish you were born a woman. Like a prick, you are having second thoughts. You are shrinking, and your two little balls are shrinking with you. And the fact that you've got "Replica" written down the side of your guns, and the fact that I've got "Desert Eagle point-five-oh" written down the side of mine, should precipitate your balls into shrinking, along with your presence. Now...f**k off! --Snatch @@@ Ah Jong (Chow Yun-Fat): Easy to pick up, hard to put down. --The Killer @@@ U.S. Deputy Marshal Sam Gerard (Tommy Lee Jones): Got a backup weapon? Special Agent John Royce (Robert Downey Jr.): Never had the need. U.S. Deputy Marshal Sam Gerard: Get one. Keep it in your suit unless I tell you to take it out. Get yourself a Glock and lose that nickel plated sissy pistol. --U.S. Marshals @@@ Shane (Alan Ladd): A gun is a tool Marion; no better or worse than the man who uses it. --Shane @@@ Little Bill Daggett (Gene Hackman): Well, sir, you are a cowardly son of a bitch! You just shot an unarmed man! William Munny (Clint Eastwood): Well, he should have armed himself if he's going to decorate his saloon with my friend. --Unforgiven @@@ Lucky Ned Pepper (Robert Duvall): What's your intention? Do you think one on four is a dogfall? Rooster Cogburn (John Wayne): I mean to kill you in one minute, Ned. Or see you hanged in Fort Smith at Judge Parker's convenience. Which'll it be? Lucky Ned Pepper: I call that bold talk for a one-eyed fat man. Rooster Cogburn: Fill your hands, you son of a bitch! --True Grit @@@ Goudy (Alfred Ryder): Now is it not true that you sprang up on old man Wharton and his two sons with a deadly, six shot revolver in your hand? Rooster Cogburn (John Wayne): I always try to be ready. Goudy: Was this revolver loaded and cocked? Rooster Cogburn: Well, a gun that's unloaded and cocked ain't good for nothin'. --True Grit @@@ Alexa "Lex" Woods (Sanaa Lathan): Seven seasons on the ice, and I've never seen a gun save someone's life. Adele Rousseau (Agathe De La Boulaye ): I don't plan on using it. Alexa "Lex" Woods: Then why bring it? Adele Rousseau: Same principle as a condom. I'd rather have one and not need it, than need one and not have it. --Alien vs. Predator @@@ Josey Wales (Clint Eastwood): Are you gonna pull those pistols or whistle Dixie? --The Outlaw Josey Wales @@@ Insp. Harry Callahan (Clint Eastwood): Well, we're not just gonna let you walk out of here. Crook: Who's "we", sucka? Insp. Harry Callahan: Smith and Wesson... and me. --Sudden Impact @@@ Gorman (William Hope): Apone! Look... we can't have any firing in there. I, uh... I want you to collect magazines from everybody. Private R. Frost (Ricco Ross): What the hell are we supposed to use, man? Harsh language? --Aliens @@@ Homer Simpson (Dan Castellaneta): I'm sorry I lied to you Marge, but this gun had a hold on me. I felt this incredible surge of power, like God must feel when he's holding a gun. --The Simpsons @@@ Mr. Bill Hertz (Paul Giamatti): Come on Smith, guns don't kill people -- but they sure help. --Shoot 'Em Up @@@ Mr. Smith (Clive Owen): Aren't guns just f**king great, Hammerson? --Shoot 'Em Up @@@ Hammerson (Stephen McHattie): You know, Hertz, people love guns because America is a land of opportunity where a poor man can become rich and a pussy can become a tough guy, if he's got a gun in his hand. Now, I'm hopin' you're not just a pussy with a gun in your hand. Mr. Bill Hertz (Paul Giamatti): Oh no sir, no, no I am not. I am a tough guy with a pussy in my hand. --Shoot 'Em Up @@@ Korean Thug Kim (Walter Wong): What the f**k is this? We said a machine gun! Tom Ludlow (Keanu Reeves): It is a machine gun. Korean Boss Kim (Ken Choi): The kind you can carry! Tom Ludlow: Couldn't get any of those. This baby's got character. Korean War vintage. Maybe even mowed down one of your grandpapa-sans when he was charging the wire at Inchon. --Street Kings @@@ Valentin Zukovsky (Robbie Coltrane): Walther PPK, Seven-Point-Six-Five-Millimeter. Only three men I know use such a gun... and I believe I've killed two of them. James Bond (Pierce Brosnan): Lucky me, then. --GoldenEye @@@ Insp. Harry Callahan (Clint Eastwood): Not bad. Horace King (Albert Popwell): Not bad, my ass! You've got to strain the remains for the fingerprints. Insp. Harry Callahan: Well, this is the .44 Magnum Auto Mag and it holds a 300 grain cartridge. And, if properly used, it can remove the fingerprints. --Sudden Impact @@@ Nick (Aaron Eckhart): Why didn't you use a silencer, Casey? Casey (Thomas Jane): You wanna go door-to-door and tell everybody my f**king name?!? --Thursday @@@ Gillom Rogers (Ron Howard): Mr. Books, my grouping of shots was tighter than yours. How is it you've killed so many men? John Bernard Books (John Wayne): First thing is, that target wasn't shooting back at you. Second, most men at that last second will flinch; I won't. --The Shootist @@@ Harley Davidson (Mickey Rourke): This is a Ruger Super Blackhawk four-fifty-four conversion. Marlboro Man (Don Johnson): Goddamn, Harley, that's too much gun for you. --Harley Davidson and the Marlboro Man @@@ Lt. Col. Thomas Devoe (George Clooney): Now shut up. I'm only gonna shoot you if I have to, but if I have to, I'm gonna feel real bad about it!-- The Peacemaker @@@ André Baptiste, Jr. (Sammi Rotibi): Can you bring me the gun of Rambo? Yuri Orlov (Nicolas Cage): Part One, Two, or Three? André Baptiste, Jr.: I've only seen Part One. Yuri Orlov: Ah, the M60 Machine Gun. Would you like armor piercing bullets? André Baptiste, Jr.: Please. --Lord of War @@@ Yuri Orlov (Nicolas Cage): I sell guns to every army but the Salvation Army. --Lord of War @@@ Elliott Marston (Alan Rickman): Ah, the legendary Sharps. Matthew Quigley (Tom Selleck): You know your weapons. It's a lever-action breech loader. Usual barrel length is thirty inches. This one has an extra four. It's converted to use a special forty-five caliber, hundred and ten grain metal cartridge, with a five-hundred forty grain paper patch bullet. It's fitted with double set triggers, and a Vernier sight. It's marked up to twelve-hundred yards. This one shoots a mite further. Elliot Marston: An experimental weapon with experimental ammunition. Matthew Quigley: You could call it that. Elliot Marston: Let's experiment. --Quigley Down Under @@@ Fogell (Christopher Mintz-Plasse): What's it like to have a gun? Officer Michaels (Seth Rogen) : It's like having two cocks. If one of your cocks could kill someone. --Superbad @@@ Casper (Andrew Friedman): What's with all the guns? Thomas Gabriel (Timothy Olyphant): Operational prudence. Think of them as hardware to your software. --Live Free or Die Hard @@@ Sean Archer (John Travolta): Castor, your time's up. Castor Troy (Nicolas Cage): (laughs) Well, you better hit me Sean, 'cause you only got one bullet left. Sean Archer: So do you. Castor Troy: Wow! We've got something in common. We both know our guns. --Face/Off @@@ The Caller (Kiefer Sutherland): (chambers rifle) Now doesn't that just torque your jaws? I love that. You know like in the movies just as the good guy is about to kill the bad guy, he cocks his gun. Now why didn't he have it cocked? Because that sound is scary. It's cool, isn't it? --Phone Booth @@@ The Caller (Kiefer Sutherland): You're in this position because you're not telling the truth. Stu Shepard (Colin Farrell): No, I'm in this f**king position because you have a gun! --Phone Booth @@@ Mikaela Banes (Megan Fox): I'll drive, you shoot! -- Transformers @@@ The Schofield Kid (Jaimz Woolvett): It don't seem real... how he ain't gonna never breathe again, ever... how he's dead. And the other one too. All on account of pulling a trigger. William Munny (Clint Eastwood): It's a hell of a thing, killing a man. Take away all he's got and all he's ever gonna have. The Schofield Kid: Yeah, I guess they had it coming. William Munny: We all have it coming, kid. -- Unforgiven @@@ Turk (Robert De Niro): Most people respect the badge. Everyone respects the gun. -- Righteous Kill @@@ Roger Murtaugh (Danny Glover): That's some serious sh*t you carry. Martin Riggs (Mel Gibson): Be my guest. Roger Murtaugh: Nine millimeter Beretta. Takes fifteen in the mag, one up the pipe, wide ejection port, no feed jams. Martin Riggs: What'd you got in there? Roger Murtaugh: Four-inch Smith. Martin Riggs: Six-shooter huh? Lot of old timers carry those. -- Lethal Weapon @@@ Insp. Harry Callahan (Clint Eastwood): I just work for the city, Briggs. Lt. Briggs (Hal Holbrook): So do I. Longer than you. And I never had to take my gun of its holster once. I'm proud of that. Insp. Harry Callahan: Well, you're a good man, Lieutenant. A good man always knows his limitations. --Magnum Force @@@ Officer Nick Styles (Denzel Washington): You've got an Ithaca thirty-seven twelve gauge with a five pound slide. By the time it takes you to pump it one time, I'll have three bullets in your chest, one in your head and I'll be on my way back to the station eatin' donuts and doing paperwork. Now I like donuts, but I hate the paperwork. --Ricochet @@@ Clarence Boddicker (Kurtwood Smith): Ooooo! Guns! Guns! Guns! --RoboCop @@@ Marlboro Man (Don Johnson):You know that gun costs about two bucks every time you fire it? That's two bucks a bullet. Harley Davidson (Mickey Rourke): Well, how many I hit? Marlboro Man (Don Johnson): You spent twelve bucks and didn't hit a goddamn thing. --Harley Davidson and the Marlboro Man @@@ Captain Steele (Jason Isaacs):Delta or no Delta, that's a hot weapon. You know better than that. Safety should be on at all times on base. Hoot (Eric Bana): (raises trigger finger) Well, this is my safety, sir. --Black Hawk Down @@@ Wyatt Earp (Kurt Russell): Go ahead. Skin it. Skin that smoke wagon and see what happens.. --Tombstone @@@ LAPD Helicopter Pilot (Chuck Tamburro): That's a damn Minigun! --Terminator 2: Judgment Day @@@ Hans Gruber (Alan Rickman):(reading McClane's message) Now I have a machine gun. Ho...Ho...Ho. --Die Hard @@@ John McClane (Bruce Willis): Know how to use a handgun, Bill? Hans Gruber (Alan Rickman): I spent a weekend at a combat range. You know those guns that shoot red paint? John McClane (Bruce Willis): (hands over his Beretta) It's time for the real thing, Bill. All you gotta do is pull the trigger. --Die Hard @@@ Sheriff Tod Shaw (Sterling Hayden): Don't play God just because you've got a gun. John Baron (Frank Sinatra): But you see Sheriff, that's the way it is. When you've got a gun you are a sort of god. If you had a gun, I'd be the chump and you'd be the god. The gun gives you the power of life and death. --Suddenly @@@ Cody (Danny McBride): It's a pretty cool sidearm you got there. What is it? Four Leaf Tayback (Nick Nolte): I don't know what it's called. I just know the sound it makes when it takes a man's life. --Tropic Thunder @@@ Charlie Simms (Chris O'Donnell): Where did you get the gun, Colonel? Lt. Col. Frank Slade (Al Pacino): Piece or weapon, Charlie, never a gun. Charlie Simms: Where did you get the piece? Lt. Col. Frank Slade: I'm an officer in the United States Army. This is my sidearm. Charlie Simms: But you're not an officer anymore. Lt. Col. Frank Slade: So I'm retired, so what? An officer never relinquishes his forty-five. --Scent of a Woman @@@ Jimmy Malone (Sean Connery): Oh what's the matter? Can't you talk with a gun in your mouth? --The Untouchables (1987) @@@ Jimmy Malone (Sean Connery): You wanna get Capone? Here's how you get him. He pulls a knife, you pull a gun. He sends one of yours to the hospital, you send one of his to the morgue! That's the Chicago way! And that's how you get Capone. --The Untouchables (1987) @@@ Sheriff Hague (Michael Biehn): Try not to shoot yourselves. Don't shoot each other. But especially... don't shoot me.. --Planet Terror @@@ Bones Darley (John Goodman): (picks up Colt Python) You've got the bastards of bastards. A three-fifty-seven, for guaranteed head removal. That's... that's a sweetie. (picks up M1911A1) You got your standard size forty-five supersize. That's a f**kin' hungry man right there. (picks up Desert Eagle) And you got the king of mayhem. Half cannon, sword of justice. Take this f**ker to the Holy Land start your own crusade. Any one of these is bound to you feel better about what's bothering you. -- Death Sentence @@@ Bones Darley (John Goodman): Go with God. Bag full of guns. -- Death Sentence @@@ Tuco (Eli Wallach): When you have to shoot...shoot don't talk. --The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly @@@ Blondie (Clint Eastwood): Every gun makes its own tune. --The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly @@@ Blondie (Clint Eastwood): Six the perfect number. Angel Eyes (Lee Van Cleef): I thought three was the perfect number. Blondie (Clint Eastwood): I've got six more bullets in my gun. --The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly @@@ Harry Walters (Ralph Fiennes): I suppose you got a gun up there? Ray (Colin Farrell): Yeah. Harry Walters: What are we gonna do? We can't stand here all night. Marie (Thekla Reuten): Why don't you both put your guns down, go home. Harry Walters: Do be stupid, this is the shootout. -- In Bruges @@@ Lasky (John Candy): Thats not a real gun is it Clark? Clark (Chevy Chase): Are you kidding? This is a Magnum P.I. Lasky: It's a BB gun! Clark: Don't tempt me. I could put an eye out with this thing. Lasky: You couldn't even break the skin with that thing. -- National Lampoon's Vacation @@@ </random>