Hot Dogs, Horseshoes & Hand Grenades

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Hot Dogs, Horseshoes & Hand Grenades (2016)

Hot Dogs, Horseshoes & Hand Grenades, also known as H3VR, is a virtual-reality shooting gallery sandbox game with an emphasis on realistic weapon operation. Using the HTC Vive's motion controllers players can manipulate individual rounds in a magazine, pull the cocking lever, flip safeties, deploy a bipod, fold or collapse the stock, dry-fire, and even adjust the zeroing on sights and scopes. The axis of the motion controller even conforms to the angle of each individual weapon's grip.

Outside of custom models created for the game, a good portion of the game's weapon models come from either publicly available 3D assets sold on asset stores and direct donations from freelance weapon artists to the game's lead Anton Hand. With some detailed research, it is even possible to identify the exact creators of individual models, either by researching in the asset stores or artist portfolios. For instance, many of the early weapons have made-up markings, a feature of weapons from the "Ultimate FPS Weapons Pack" by weapon artist ChamferZone, and a series of Mauser C96 variants added later in the game are all from the "Mauser Pistol Pack" by Stefan Engdahl. More info on weapon assets and artists can be found in the discussion page.

Additional note: due to inherent difficulties with VR screenshots, most screenshots on this page are from devlog videos by game director Anton Hand, with the remainder being provided by members of the game's Reddit page, r/H3VR; these users will be noted in the respective weapons' sections.
The following weapons are seen in the video game Hot Dogs, Horseshoes & Hand Grenades:

Contents


Pistols

Beretta 92FS

While not directly usable in-game, a Beretta 92FS (different from the M9A1 below) is seen on the item spawner's instruction panel as an example handgun, showing off some standard controls and functions.

Beretta 92FS - 9x19mm
The Beretta on the instruction panel.

Beretta 92FS (Grammaton Cleric pistol)

Replicas of the modified Grammaton Cleric pistol from the movie Equilibrium are available in-game, having been added through Update #37. The Grammaton Cleric comes in full-auto, and boasts the same interesting muzzle flash as the movie gun.

Screen-used rubber stunt gun. Note that this weapon lacks the selector switch of the detailed Hero gun.
While having fun in the gun-fu range, we get a good look at the Cleric model.
Of course, seeing as two is one and one is none, a second pistol must also be loaded.
And cocked.
With that sorted, it's time to unleash some completely emotionless fury on the walls of the room. Note the shape of the muzzle flashes.
Practicing some Gun Kata, in the "Cleric Battle" MEATS mode.

Beretta 950BS Jetfire

The Beretta 950 Jetfire is one of the available firearms in-game, having been added through the first Meatmas update. 2 versions are available - a standard blued model with black plastic grips, and a gold-plated model with mother-of-pearl grips.

Beretta 950BS (Post-1968) Jetfire - .25 ACP. This has the thumb safety that the pre-1968 models do not.
Behold, a downright diminutive Italian handgun. Well, it isn't called a "pocket pistol" for nothing...
Using an M1911A1 for comparison really gives one an idea of just how small the Jetfire actually is.
A nice touch, the barrel can be popped up for loading, just like on the real weapon.
A look down the barrel reveals that the weapon's bore is fully modeled, rather than being solid with a drawn-on hole at either end like in many games.
Loading a single .25 ACP round into the barrel...
...and a magazine with 8 more into the magazine well.
Of course, what is a tiny pocket pistol without a gold-plated version?
And what is a gold-plated pocket pistol without a matching golden magazine?
Seeing as manual chamber-loading is for peasants, the only proper high-class way to use the Jetfire is to chamber rounds by racking the slide.
Aiming the golden Jetfire, which isn't easy considering the size of the sights. The fact that you're probably looking down your nose at your target doesn't help either.
Firing a .25 round at the lowly commoner paper target ahead.

Beretta M9A1

The Beretta M9A1 is one of the 4 pistols added in Update #5. Upon its introduction, it was permanently fitted with a suppressor; this was removed in favor of a threaded barrel in Update #20 (which introduced detachable suppressors to the game).

Beretta M9A1 - 9x19mm Parabellum
Sometimes you want to save your hearing, so use a suppressed M9A1.
And sometimes you really don't give a damn, so you take the suppressor off.
Sometimes you feel like admiring both sides of your pistol, even though they're nearly identical.
Sometimes you load the pistol.
And sometimes you even chamber it.
Sometimes you line the sights up properly. (This isn't one of those times).
And sometimes, every once in a while, you actually fire your M9A1.
Sometimes you sheepishly admit your mistake, and put the suppressor back on.
Sometimes you then realize that you maybe should've picked a smaller suppressor.
And sometimes you remember that H3 actually requires you to screw the suppressor onto the barrel, instead of just sticking it there.

Beretta M9A3

Update #52 added a Beretta M9A3 to the game, complete with its own unique (yet interchangeable) 17-round magazines.

Beretta M9A3 - 9x19mm Parabellum
Loading the M9A3 with a 17-round magazine, complete with matching-colored baseplate...
...and racking the slide.
Admiring the Beretta's light-brown finish.
A look at the M9A3's iron sights; as with many of the game's pistols, these are of the 3-dot variety.
Firing off a shot.

Beretta Px4 Storm

The Beretta Px4 Storm is one of the available firearms in-game. It was added in Update #20, and is correctly able to share magazines with the earlier M9A1, the concurrently-added Cx4, and the later-added Mx4.

Beretta Px4 Storm - 9x19mm Parabellum
A little time at the range, and some fresh rounds for the Px4.
What a perfect way to spend an afternoon.
Pausing to admire the Px4, and to note its (exceedingly shiny) protruding threaded barrel.
Aiming the Px4, which is complicated somewhat by the controller's outline getting in the way.
Still, you can make do. However, if you're that particular about aiming...
...you can always just do this.

Bergmann-Bayard M1901 "Simplex"

The Wurstwurld update brought along a Bergmann Simplex pocket pistol, among many other things. Of note is that this is the first ever appearance of this weapon in a video game, and only the second documented appearance of it in any form of media, the first being in The Mystic Archives of Dantalian.

Bergmann-Bayard M1901 "Simplex" - 8x18mm Simplex
Admiring the Simplex in the heat of the desert sun.
Loading in a magazine, which contains 5 rounds of proprietary (and rather anemic) 8x18mm ammunition; this doesn't exactly add up to a whole lot of firepower.
Chambering the first of these 5 rounds with a quick tug of the bolt.
Aiming the pistol. Small gun, small sights.
Firing. In spite of the small cartridge, it's still perfectly capable of blowing a jug to pieces. An ejected casing can just barely be seen to the upper-right.

Browning Hi-Power

The Browning Hi-Power was the first weapon added in the 1st Meatmas update. Notably, it is correctly depicted as being unfireable without a magazine inserted.

Classic Commercial Browning Hi-Power (Belgian manufacture) - 9x19mm
The player character loading some batteries into their new toy.
Examining the left side of the Hi-Power...
...and the right side. What a lovely gift.
Taking aim at a gumdrop...
...before remembering to chamber a round.
With that issue dealt with, it's time to make this winter wonderland a whole lot less peaceful.

Charter Arms Explorer II

Update #59's 9th alpha build brought along a Charter Arms Explorer II, a pistol variant of the Armalite AR-7 survival rifle.

Charter Arms Explorer II - .22 LR
The right side of the Explorer...
...and the left. An interesting-looking pistol, to be sure; shame that it never really took off.
Fiddling with the cocking handle.
Admiring the Explorer inside a derelict house; the pistol has quite a different profile with its magazine inserted.
Quite a different profile indeed.
Firing the Explorer into the house's ceiling, much to its owner's chagrin.

Colt Defender

The 12th and final alpha build of Update #52 added a Colt Defender, chambered in .45 ACP.

Colt Defender - .45 ACP
Inspecting the left side of the Defender. Note the lack of slide markings; the weapon artist's renders of the model show it with a full set of Colt rollmarks, but these were removed for copyright reasons. However, the "Series 90" marking is still present in-game, as hard as it is to see here.
The right side; in the words of many an unfinished page, "Nice, but where's the trigger?" The answer is that it's in the magwell; this bug was fixed in the following update.
Loading a 7-round magazine into the pistol.
Racking the slide.
Bringing the sights on target; as with several of the game's other M1911 variants, it has illuminated 3-dot sights.
Putting a round on the paper. Or rather, through the paper.
Dropping an empty magazine out of the Defender, while noticing another one on the table...
...which, of course, leaves only one thing to do.

Colt M1911A1

The M1911A1 is one of the available firearms in-game, added in Update #3. Update #23 added 2 cosmetic variants: one with a matte-gray finish and green synthetic grips, and one with a gold-plated finish and black grips. A unique version of the latter with unlimited ammunition, full-automatic fire capability, and a length of about 1 meter is available in the Meatmas level; this is referred to as, of all possible names, "Floppy McLongflopper".

Pre-War Commercial Colt M1911A1 with factory deep-blued finish - .45 ACP
Starting things off, as always, with a quick sound check. Make sure your speakers aren't up too high.
Rewinding a bit, and loading in a magazine.
Racking the slide, only to discover just a little bit too late that this wasn't really necessary. Oh well.
Pausing for a minute to look at the pistol. The blued finish is lovely on this side.
As it is on this one.
The M1911A1's safety, which has 2 positions: here, in the lower position, is "fire"...
...and here, in the upward position, is "safe". This position pushes the lever into a notch in the bottom of the slide, which has the additional effect of preventing the slide from moving.
The M1911A1's sights; a set of nice, clear, aftermarket 3-dot illuminated irons.
That wasn't always the case, though; the M1911A1's sights looked like this until Update #5, when the luminous green dots were added.
7 rounds later, the M1911A1 locks empty.
Dumping out the dry magazine...
...and hitting the slide release.
Ithaca-manufactured M1911A1 with matte-gray finish - .45 ACP
Here's the nickel-plated version...
Colt M1911A1 (airsoft replica) with gold-plated finish - (fake) .45 ACP
...and here's the golden one.

Lebman Machine Pistol

A fully-automatic variant of the M1911A1, based on the machine pistol conversions created by Hyman Lebman, is one of Update #52's additions.

Hyman Lebman-converted M1911A1 machine pistol - .45 ACP
The converted M1911A1, complete with Cutts compensator and Thompson-type foregrip.
Loading in the weapon's unique magazine (which is interchangeable with other M1911 pistols and magazines).
Said magazine holds 18 rounds, and is essentially just several existing magazines welded together.
Pulling back the slide.
Pseudo-aiming the pistol, which is close enough to actually aiming it to show off the illuminated sights; these are a byproduct of the weapon being a modified version of the existing M1911A1 model, and aren't expected to stay.
Especially when one considers the sheer amount of recoil this weapon produces, which renders aiming a bit unnecessary anyways.

"Oversize M1911A1"

Update #52's 7th alpha build (the April Fools' Day special) included the so-called "Oversize" version of the M1911A1. As the name implies, it is substantially larger than the standard M1911A1, being more akin in size to a howitzer than a handgun; to facilitate human use, it is fitted with several RIS-type grips for handling, a rail on the side for sights (as attempting to aim with the standard slide-mounted irons would likely lead to the user being decapitated), and an equally massive bipod for more stable use.

It fires the ".45 ACP Oversize" round, which, amusingly, had already been added to the game several updates prior; many enterprising players combined this with the ability to cook off and/or directly strike the primers of loose rounds to set them off (introduced in Update #48), and the game's substantial amounts of freedom with regards to rail adaptor placement (or spacially-lockable platforms, for that matter) to create various devices to launch these rounds.

"Huh? What's this? Why would someone make a massive 1911 magaz..."
"Oh."
Loading the massive magazine into the massive handgun. Awkward angles are all but mandatory.
Racking the slide (by way of the diagonally-attached handle on the side); this shot also shows that the rather literal hand-cannon is apparently made by "HEDEN GUN CO. INC" out of "HEDEN, .N.Y". This fictional manufacturer (complete with fictional town and mis-written postal code) is shared with the standard M1911A1 variants (which makes sense, as the Oversize is a scaled-up version thereof).
Firing a "Mortar" round (which, as previously shown, uses the model of a tracer, and as presently shown, looks like one when initially fired).
This round is the simplest of the 3 available types, being an impact-detonated high-explosive shell, as seen here.
That shell plus 6 more equals an empty artillery piece, meriting a mag swap; this is done by punching (yes, punching) the magazine release button...
...which, assuming that the gun is high enough off the ground, dumps out the magazine with a loud "CLUNK".
If you're feeling tired after hefting around a literal artillery piece, no worries!
Just unfold the bipod, and take a load off.
A bit of futzing with the ammo spawning panel grants a magazine loaded with what appear to be jacketed hollowpoints; these are actually what are known as "Mega Buckshot" rounds.
""Mega Buckshot"? What on Earth could that possibly..."
"...wow. I don't know what I was expecting, but it sure as hell wasn't that."
Firing off another MBS round with the game's optional bullet trails enabled gives a better idea of just what "that" is: each shell fires several "pellets", if you will; upon hitting a surface, these "pellets" explode, releasing a burst of .50 BMG tracer projectiles.
Loading the last type of round directly into the chamber; this round, visually resembling an FMJ, is a MIRV (Multiple Indepent Reentry Vehicle) round. It's not every day that you see something with terminology more generally associated with long-range ballistic missiles being loaded into a handgun.
If grabbing a hold of the slide-mounted grip and wrestling with the recoil spring directly just isn't your style, the slide release is always an option.
Just grab on, and yank downward with everything you've got.
One of the more bizarre features of the weapon (yes, it gets more bizarre) is the exposed firing pin; should one not want to disturb a well lined-up shot, they can simply leave the pistol as-is, and hit the firing pin with another, smaller handgun, like this M29 here.
Preferably from slightly further away, assuming that you value your wrists more than a close view of the MIRV round's curious blue tracer. A real priorital toss-up, I know.
Thanks to the magic of bullet trails, the MIRV round's mechanics can be more clearly seen; each shell starts out solid, then splits into 7 smaller explosive shells after a fixed period in mid-air (or just explodes all at once if it hits something first).

Colt Woodsman Match Target

One of the weapons added in the 2018 Halloween update (the main headline of which was the Return of the Rotweiners gamemode, a large-scale rogue-lite zombie RPG) was a Colt Woodsman Match Target .22 target pistol with gold-inlaid engravings and pearl grips.

Colt Woodsman Match Target (3rd Series) - .22 LR
Admiring the Woodsman, engravings and all. A lovely addition; shame that they provide no tactical advantage whatsoever.
Doing some quick-belt management. Glock 17? Check. Woodsman? Check. Spare mags? Check. Knife? Check. Hatchet? Check. Pie? Check.
Shooting a Rotweiner point-blank with the Colt.
"Aiming" the pistol, Doom-style, at a charging Blut (a tougher, tankier type of Rotweiner). This gives a good view of the engravings on the top of the barrel, as well as the asymmetric target-style profile of the grips.
Unfortunately, a volley of unjacketed .22 LR rounds proves insufficient to stop the Blut, resulting in this rather... uncomfortable situation.
The situation dealt with, our survivalist ejects a magazine, taking note of the heel-mounted magazine release (indicative of a 3rd Series model)...
...loads in a new one...
...and powerstrokes the slide. The lack of visible hands might make this difficult to see; note how the slide is just a tad bit further back than in the previous shots.

"Cyber Pistol"

One of the first firearms added to H3VR (before it even carried that name, in fact), along with the "Cartoon 8 Gauge" sawn-off shotgun, was the "Cyber Pistol", a fictional semi-automatic handgun with an integrated laser sight. It feeds from a 9-round single-stack magazine; this initially used a simple, proprietary round known only as "Cyber Pistol" ammunition; in Update #52, it was changed to use the same "10mm DSM" ammo as the LAPD 2019 Blaster. The Cyber Pistol isn't presently attainable through the standard item spawner, though some scenes feature an Easter egg fully-automatic version with infinite ammo, and the standard version can be obtained through random spawns in modes such as Take & Hold.

A pair of Cyber Pistols on a table, along with a crate of neatly-arranged magazines.
The left side of the Cyber Pistol, which looks more or less the same as the right.
Loading in a magazine; note that this shot is from an earlier build of H3, in which magazine loading worked rather differently: as soon as a magazine entered the well, it locked into place, allowing no movement other than upwards or downwards, until the magazine either locked into place or fell back out of the well (respectively).
The floating instructions/guide arrows on objects are another long-gone feature.
Firing the pistol. The trail of casings isn't due to the pistol being fully-automatic; it's simply a by-product of its rather weak ejection.
Dumping the empty magazine out (so empty, in fact, that it seemingly doesn't have a spring)...
...loading in a new one...
...and releasing the locked-back slide.
2 more years, 1 new cartridge. For this gun, at least - dozens of cartridges were added between the build in which the first screenshots were taken and this one.
Loading the Cyber Pistol up with this new, novel, actually-named ammunition.
Aiming (more or less); the Cyber Pistol was the first of many in-game weapons to have illuminated green iron sights.
Firing the updated Cyber Pistol, which shows off its interesting blue muzzle flash.
It's a blink-and-you'll-miss-it effect, though - you might even say it's... gone in a flash.
...I'll leave.

CZ 75 SP-01 SHADOW

The CZ 75 SP-01 SHADOW is one of the available firearms in-game, being one of the many weapons added through the 1st Meatmas update.

CZ 75 SP-01 SHADOW - 9x19mm
Giving the viewers at home a good look at the CZ's model.
The pistol's other side. The markings on the slide read "AP 85 SP-02", seemingly in a copyright-motivated effort to subtly change every single part of the gun's name.
Loading a 17-round magazine into the CZ 75.
Racking the pistol's slide.
Aiming through the 75's illuminated 3-dot sights.
Said sights make landing shots on target substantially easier, especially when compared to some of the game's older, smaller-sighted handguns.
Dropping an empty magazine out of the empty CZ.

Desert Eagle Mark VII

A Desert Eagle Mark VII, chambered in .44 Magnum is one of the available firearms in-game. It was added in Update #26, an update that (perhaps more significantly) also added the Meat Grinder gamemode.

On April Fools' Day of 2018, Update #52's 7th alpha build was released. Among other things, this included the "Degle.50", a cardboard Desert Eagle held together with duct tape. The weapon was meant as a joke response to a poorly-spelled Steam request for a replica of the Desert Eagle seen in Blue Estate. It fires the ".50 Imaginary" round, of which several types (with names just as eloquent as that of the pistol itself) are available. To top it off, all of the Degle's sound effects were created by game director Anton Hand - not mixed, mind you, but literally created - the sounds are all Anton saying various onomatopoeia associated with the weapon's functions.

IMI Desert Eagle Mark VII - .44 Magnum
Loading up a Desert Eagle.
Racking the slide.
Aiming (or at least attempting to)...
...and firing.
Wrists? Who needs wrists?
Practicing for an upcoming role as [INSERT GENERIC ACTION MOVIE PROTAGONIST HERE].
Engaging in some more generally unacceptable range behavior.
Ejecting a pair of empty magazines.
"Your scientists were so preoccupied with whether or not they could, they didn't stop to think if they should."
"a wepon 2 sirpas metle geer".
Loading a cardboard magazine into the cardboard pistol. These magazines hold 8 rounds; a real .50 Desert Eagle's magazine holds only seven, but then again, this isn't even supposed to be a "real" Desert Eagle in-game.
One of the more curious elements of the Degle is its fully functional safety, seen here in the "safe" position...
...and here in the "fire" position, with each manipulation of the switch producing an audibly bearded "tink".
Pulling back the slide; note that, interestingly, the Degle's black marker markings are written slightly differently on either side of the barrel, reflecting its small-hand-made nature.
Demonstrating a small child's understanding of the concept called "aiming"; the cardboard sights are actually more serviceable than one might think, not that this shot really shows that.
The Degle in full recoil; yes, it even ejects cardboard casings.
A list of the various types of .50 Imaginary rounds available, seen here in the ammo spawning panel. From top to bottom: "BOOOMY" (fragmenting explosive) rounds, "FLASHY" (tracer) rounds, the currently-selected "MEGA!!1!" rounds, "NERMAL" (normal) rounds, "POINTYOWW!" (armor-piercing) rounds, and "SOOPER SPESHUL" (high-velocity) rounds.
Taking a look at an empty magazine...
...the model of which changes to reflect when it's loaded, as seen here with a full load of "NERMAL" cardboard rounds.
The use of the game's optional bullet trails reveals that these have more or less the ballistics one would expect out of a piece of cardboard fired from another piece of cardboard. Nermal indeed.
On the other hand, the "SOOPER SPESHUL" rounds fly straight as an arrow. Also note the exaggerated cloud of smoke, yet another by-product of this being a child's interpretation of how a gun works.
The "BOOOMY" ammo, which produces a suitably impressive spray of red glowing shrapnel.
Taking a look at a magazine full of blue-tipped "MEGA!!1!" rounds through the locked-open slide's ejection port; the cardboard rounds are, in fact, color-coded. But u cant see wat da MEGA bullitz do, becuz its SOOOOOOOPER SEEKRIT!!1!1!!!1

Desert Eagle Mark XIX

To compliment the .44 Mark VII, Update #58 added a Desert Eagle Mark XIX in .50 Action Express. The in-game handgun is a more recent Magnum Research model, with rails on the barrel and frame, and a ported barrel.

Magnum Research Desert Eagle Mark XIX w/ported barrel - .50 AE
Admiring the newer Desert Eagle.
A closeup of the barrel, which reveals that the handgun is marked ".50 AE", and nothing else. No trademarks, no model designation, nothing.
Well, at least it has a serial number.
Loading in a magazine.
Chambering a .50 Action Express round.
Firing the handcannon.

FN Five-seveN

Update #58 added a much-requested handgun, the FN Five-seveN. The in-game weapon is a USG model, the most common of the bunch (despite no longer being in production), and has an FDE frame.

FN Five-seveN USG - 5.7x28mm
The left side of the Five-seveN...
...and the right side.
Toying with the safety.
Unusually for a striker-fired pistol, the Five-seveN's safety is also a decocker.
All that aside, it's high time to actually load the handgun.
And, of course, to chamber it. This also cocks the striker, rendering the above discussion of the decocker/safety a bit of a moot point.
The Five-seveN's sights, which are of the adjustable 3-dot variety.
Firing off a shot.
That round plus 19 later, and the empty magazine is jettisoned from the pistol.
One of the new features introduced in Update #58 is the ability to rack pistol slides with things other than the user's hands, as seen in this appalling display of muzzle unawareness. The emptiness of the pistol and the range alike go some way to make up for this.

French UNION

So far the only known media appearance of this fairly rare French machine pistol, the UNION was a version of the Ruby capable of full-auto fire. It had a distinctive 35-round horseshoe magazine, which is replicated in-game.

French UNION with magazine and loading tool - .32 ACP
When you have a game with the word "Horseshoes" in the name, you need to have a gun involving horseshoes. It's just mandatory.
Loading in the magazine...
...which results in something exactly as ridiculous-looking as you'd expect.
Pulling back the UNION's slide.
Aiming; this is a rather pointless activity, considering both the weapon's lack of sights and its short effective range.
Unleashing a barrage of .32 ACP rounds.
35 of the aforementioned rounds later, the UNION locks open, showing off the fluting of the barrel, which is normally covered by the slide.
A closeup of the pistol, following a quick mag change. This shows off the labeled witness holes in the magazine (which actually allow for the viewing of cartridges in-game, and are placed every 5 rounds, starting at 15), as well as the markings, which read "PISTOLET AUTOMATIQUE FRANCAIS" on the first line, "FABRIQUE A STETIENNE-CAL 7.65" on the second, "UNION" both on the grip and to the right of the other slide markings (in quotation marks on the latter, oddly enough), and "TRADE MARK" surrounding a manufacturer's logo in the center of the grip panel. While not visible here, the front of the lower frame indicates that the serial number is 0424, and the magazine is marked "CHARGEUR "UNION" CAL.7/65 BTE S.G.D.G".
Just in case it wasn't ridiculous enough already, the unique magazine shape of the UNION allows for... this.

Glock 17

Update #53 added a series of 9x19mm Glock pistols, the first of which being the ubiquitous Glock 17 to H3VR, specifically a 4th-generation model. It comes in 2 flavors - vanilla, and "Custom", the latter having a flared magazine well, raised aftermarket iron sights, a slide-mounted red dot sight, and a modified slide resembling the ZEV Technologies Dragonfly, with diagonal slide serrations and milling cuts around the barrel. It also comes with a unique magazine, interchangeable with the other 9mm Glocks.

Glock 17 - 9x19mm Parabellum
Examining the Glock. The aggressive grip texturing, large magazine release, and straighter dustcover peg this as a Gen 4 model.
The other side. Were it not for the fact that it's a couple generations too modern, one could assume that the dust came from all that time in the desert.
Loading in a has-absolutely-nothing-to-do-with-the-model-number 17-round magazine.
Chambering a round.
Taking a look through the Glock's factory-standard Patridge iron sights.
Sending a round downrange.
Taking advantage of the Glock's frame-mounted rail, and affixing a laser sight. But this isn't just any ordinary laser sight...
...it's a purple laser sight.
Giving the bullseye a taste of some violet violence.
All alliterations aside, an arresting abstract abolishes an abandoned armory after an abrupt age amidst an advanced abbreviated arquebus.

Custom

Custom Glock 17 with ZEV Technologies Dragonfly slide, ZEV slim aluminum magwell, and other custom parts - 9x19mm Parabellum
"With these upgrades, you never stood a chance."
The other side of the pseudo-racegun G17.
Grabbing one of the special magazines, and...
"Nah."
Racking the heavily-milled slide.
Taking a look through the integrated red-dot sight, which co-witnesses with the aftermarket raised 3-dot sights.
Firing off a shot, after having the common sense to move the pistol a little further from the face.
Trying out a couple of laser sights...
...this one being red...
...and this one being...
...green.

Glock 18

The second (or third, if you count the custom G17) Glock variant added in Update #53 is a 2nd-generation Glock 18 machine pistol.

Glock 18 - 9x19mm Parabellum
Taking a look at the G18.
A closeup of the Glock, which gives a good look at the mysterious switch on the slide...
Loading in a magazine.
Giving the slide a tug.
Taking a look through the irons; like the 17, these are factory Patridge sights.
Firing off a shot.
Remembering the mysterious switch from earlier. Wonder what it does...
"Well, only one way to find out..."
"Oh."
Dropping out the emptied-in-under-a-second magazine.
Attaching a suppressor...
...loading in a 33-round magazine...
...and going to town.

Glock 19

The third (or, again, fourth if the customized G17 is counted) and final Update #53 Glock is a 3rd-gen Glock 19 with an FDE frame and a extended threaded barrel. Before it was made a usable weapon, a compact-sized Glock akin to the 19 (albeit with a Glock 26-length barrel and slide) was made available to SWBs (Soldier Weiner-Bots) back in Update #46, although according to its Sosigun spawn-menu name, it is apparently meant as a cartoonish Glock 17.

Glock 19 - 9x19mm Parabellum
Looking over the G19; the "19", "AUSTRIA", and "9x19" markings are present, but the manufacturer's trademark is conspicuously absent.
The other side of the Glock. Not much to say here. Well, not without starting a debate about Flat Dark Earth finishes, anyway.
Mashing a 33-round magazine into the pistol. The G19 has no magazine of its own; presumably, this is due to the fact that while the other 9x19mm Glocks' magazines can fit into the G19, the G19's 15-rounder can't fit into the larger models, and H3's code doesn't support that sort of one-way compatibility.
Putting the first of the 33 aforementioned cartridges into the chamber.
A look at the sights; unlike the G17 and G18 (but like the G22), the G19 uses 3-dot irons.
Letting a 9x19mm round fly.
A Weinerbot ambles into an objective room...
...and is promptly greeted with an axe to the face. If you can really call the featureless front of a Weinerbot's head a "face".
With the release of Update #59's second alpha build, the bots' Glock was made into a new type of object - a so-called "Sosigun" (so named because the new enemy that wields them is known as the "Sosig").
Their simplistic (yet somewhat surprisingly detailed) model reflects the simplistic nature of their use - the only thing that the player can do with one of these is to fire it until it runs dry, with actions like slide-racking and reloading being entirely impossible. This is largely in the interest of performance; were enemies to wield fully-detailed weapons with full sets of interactions, the user's computer would very quickly begin to smell of smoke.
Still, in spite of this, there is at least one detail worth noting:
Despite, again, being extremely simplistic models with only one possible point of interaction, these weapons still have reciprocating slides.
Furthermore, the enemies' weapons' newfound physicality gives the player the ability to rip a Sosig's weapon right out of its nonexistent hands...
...and either throw it clear across the room...
...or simply shoot the Sosig in the "face" with it.
A paranoid Sosig firing its Glock at another's corpse. This was caused by a bug in Update #59's early alpha builds; spawning the Sosigs, enabling wander/fight behavior, and setting them to different IFFs with dead Sosigs already present would cause the live Sosigs to identify the dead ones as threats.
Drawing a bead on an enemy Sosig with the Glock's surprisingly workable sights.
Following the eighth alpha build of Update #59, the Sosiguns were updated with new models and textures, generally making them look less like untextured raw models from early-mid 2000s third-person shooter games, and more like toys made of rubberized plastic, so as to better fit the aesthetic of the Sosigs themselves. This particular Glock is fitted with an equally-cartoonish suppressor, which does far more to muffle the gun's report than its size and muzzle flash would lead one to believe.

Glock 22

The Glock 22 is one of the available handguns in-game, added in Update #5; a version converted to fire in full-auto was added in a later update.

Glock 22 (3rd Generation) - .40 S&W
A Glock 22 and a corresponding magazine on their respective pedestals at the start of the Gun-nasium, an timed obstacle course/shooting challenge that was used initially to test a new form of grab-based movement.
Loading in a 15-round magazine.
Racking the Glock's slide.
Shooting at a target; in the Gun-nasium, these take the form of mysterious blue cubes that levitate in place and shatter when shot.
Putting the Glock's illuminated 3-dot sights to good use, taking care of a row of the aforementioned Mysterious Blue Cubes.
Dropping an empty magazine, and watching it fall about 20 feet to the floor.
Now on stable ground, the player character loads an extended magazine into the full-auto-converted G22, which looks more or less completely identical to the standard version.
Shredding a target with a salvo of .40 S&W rounds.
A close-up of the slide, which shows off the rather... interestingly obfuscated markings.
Deciding that iron sights are for squares, our player character tacks on his hip front rail...
...before accidentally creating an abomination unto God and man.

Intratec TEC-9

The Intratec TEC-9 is one of the game's available firearms; it has a rather strange "tacticool" orange paintjob. Initially, 2 versions were available - a standard semi-auto variant, and a variant converted to full-auto; Update #53 changed the latter into a converted Interdynamic KG-9, leaving only the standard semi-auto version.

Intratec TEC-9 - 9x19mm Parabellum
Someone regrets lending his TEC-9 to those CS:GO boys down the street.
Strange paintjobs notwithstanding, he loads in a magazine...
...chambers a round...
...and opens fire, spraying 9x19mm tracer rounds left, right, and center. This is the full-auto converted model, in case the continuous stream of spent casings didn't make that clear enough. This is somewhat odd, as most full-auto TEC-9s are the earlier open-bolt KG-9 model, but a full-auto conversion of a closed-bolt TEC-9 is far from impossible. Still, Update #53 swapped this out for the more common open-bolt variant.
Taking a look at the sights, back in a location that's at least in the general vicinity of "normal"...
...and firing a single shot out of the substantially less interesting semi-auto version.

IWI Uzi Pro

Update #53 added an IWI Uzi Pro Pistol. True to its real-life nature, it is treated in-game as a semi-auto-only closed-bolt pistol, rather than as a machine pistol, as one may assume at first glance.

IWI Uzi Pro Pistol - 9x19mm Parabellum
Examining the Uzi Pro, in all of its tacti-cool glory.
The other side, which shows off the side-mounted charging handle, a distinct departure from earlier Uzi variants.
Loading in a magazine, in a rather dramatic fashion.
Pulling the charging handle. Y'know, it feels like something's missing...
...ah, yes, of course! What was missing was a red-dot sight, a railed vertical foregrip with a flashlight attached to the side, a stock from a PP-2000, and an incredibly small suppressor! How could I have not seen it!
Aiming through the attached RDS...
...and being once again reminded that this weapon, despite appearances, can't fire in full-auto.

Kimber Warrior

Update #50 added a Kimber Warrior, fitted with non-standard grip panels, raised red illuminated iron sights, and a permanently-attached red dot sight, known as the "M1911A1 Tactical". The sixth alpha build of Update #52 added a further customized model, with a slide with milling cuts, a different slide-mounted RDS, and bone grips, called the "M1911A1 Operator".

Kimber Warrior - .45 ACP
A nice, close look at the Kimber Warrior. Also seen here is the indoor range's target board; it leaves a black mark wherever a shot is placed on the corresponding target downrange, with the most recent hit being red.
A view through the Warrior's integrated RDS, which also shows off the co-witnessed illuminated sights. Meanwhile, RSOs around the world wince at the direction that the pistol is pointed.
The Warrior, locked open after a successful mag dump. The extended magazine seen here was added to the game with the weapon, holds 11 rounds, and can be freely interchanged with the standard 7-rounders.
Loading a new magazine into the Warrior.

"M1911 Operator"

Examining the left side of the "Operator"...
...and the right side. Due to a now-patched bug, the trigger is inside of the magazine well, similar to the Colt Defender above. The slide markings denote the pistol (or at least the slide) as being made by the fictitious "SNOW TIGER FIREARMS INC".
Aiming the Operator. Like the earlier Tactical model, the Operator has an integrated red-dot sight, albeit a different, higher-profile model than the earlier pistol.
Firing a round. As with all the other M1911 variants, it's chambered in .45 ACP.
Replacing the now-empty magazine with a fresh one.
Finishing off the reload with a quick tug of the slide. Note that the slide is further back here than it was in the previous shot; H3 does, in fact, show that a weapon's bolt or slide can be pulled back past its lock point.

Luger P08

The Luger P08 is another handgun option in-game, added through Update #47.

Luger P08 - 9x19mm Parabellum
A pre-release render of the Luger, complete with magazine. This image was also used to tease several other weapons to come, including an MP40, a Sturmgewehr 44, and a Karabiner 98k.
The P08 steps up to the plate, determined to make a better score on the target than the M1911A1.
Loading a magazine into the Luger; the windowed magazines do, in fact, show the rounds inside of them, both in amount and in type.
Chambering a fresh 9x19mm round. Another nice touch, the barrel and upper frame move slightly backwards as the toggle is pulled, correctly showing the weapon's short-recoil operation.
The icing on this subtle-detail cake, however, is the Luger's external extractor, which pops up when a round is present in the chamber.
Aiming; the sights are typical of pistols of the era- that is to say, small.
Unbothered by this, the invisible pair of hands holding the P08 open fire.

Luger LP08 "Artillery"

Update #52 added 3 Luger variants, the first of which being the Luger LP08 "Artillery", also known as the "Artillery Luger".

Luger LP08 - 9x19mm Parabellum
Examining the LP08. The stock is interchangeable with the Carbine's; interestingly, these stocks were also made compatible with the game's other handguns, which led to some suitably silly-looking configurations.
Loading in a 32-round Trommelmagazin 08, also known as the "Snail Drum".
Cocking the LP08.
Taking aim at the target...
...and firing.

Mauser C96

Update #43 introduced the Mauser C96 to the game. The weapon holds 10 rounds of the 7.63x25mm Mauser cartridge (which, like some in the game, was added before there were any weapons that could use them), and can be reloaded round-by-round or with a 10-round stripper clip.
Pre-War dated Mauser C96 "Broomhandle" Commercial Version - 7.63x25mm Mauser
Nothing quite like sitting back, relaxing, and admiring a beautiful early selfloading handgun.
Taking a close look at the inside of the magazine...
...before loading it with a stripper clip. 10 rounds of 7.63x25mm Mauser, straight into the magazine.
Seeing a charging paper target, "Wurston Churchill" opens fire. Despite there being a cutout for a shoulder stock in the grip's backstrap, no such attachment was available in-game until the release of Update #52.
10 rounds later, he surveys the damage. Note the rear sight, adjustable for distances far in excess of the weapon's effective range.

Mauser M712 Schnellfeuer

In a similar vein to its 3 extra Luger variants, Update #52 brought along 3 variants of the Mauser C96, the first being a Mauser M712 Schnellfeuer machine pistol.

Mauser M712 Schnellfeuer - 7.63x25mm Mauser
The M712 has quite the imposing appearance. One might even call it a Big Mama among handguns.
Loading a 40-round magazine into the Schnellfeuer.
Chambering the first of those 40 rounds with a swift tug of the bolt.
Letting all 40 rounds fly. Considering its sheer uncontrollability without a stock, there isn't really much point to aiming it.

Moses Brothers Self-Defense Engine Frontier Model B

Unlocked as a reward, the "Frontier Model B" is a precise replica of Captain Malcom's gun from Serenity and Firefly. While the original prop was actually a Taurus Model 85 in a multi-part casing meant to make it look like a semi-automatic, magazine-fed handgun, in-game it is just that- a magazine-fed, semi-automatic handgun that holds 6 rounds (plus one in the chamber) of the proprietary .36 Moses cartridge.

The prop of Mal's handgun, as seen in Firefly.

Remington Rolling Block

The Remington Rolling Block pistol is one of the available firearms in-game, added through Update #32.

Remington Rolling Block Cavalry - .50
A pair of Rolling Block pistols on a table.
Taking a good look at the pistol.
The other side. The lighting at this angle gives a good view of the somewhat worn appearance, which is to be expected of a >150-year-old handgun.
Loading the Rolling Block is a rather involved process; it starts with cocking the hammer...
...opening the breech...
...loading in a (proprietary) .50 caliber black-powder cartridge...
...and finally closing the breech.
Aiming the Rolling Block...
...and firing it, producing an impressive cloud of smoke in the process. Such is expected of black-powder firearms.
Ejecting a spent case from the pistol.

Ruger Mk III

The Ruger Mk III is one of the available firearms in-game; it was added in Update #5, and was, until the release of Update #56, the only weapon in the game chambered in .22 Long Rifle. Notably, its magazine safety (a system that prevents the pistol from firing if no magazine is inserted) is correctly simulated in-game.

Stainless Ruger Mk III w/ standard-weight barrel - .22 LR
Admiring the lovelily lithe little Ruger.
The target pistol's other side, with the change in lighting providing a good look at the well-polished finish.
Loading in a magazine...
...and pulling back the bolt to chamber a round.
The pistol's sights; a simple rear notch and front post, both black. Not the easiest to make out, but not too difficult either.
Enjoying a bit of casual plinking with the MkIII.
Ejecting an empty magazine, and breathing in that sweet, sweet smell of burnt gunpowder.

Ruger Mk IV

Update #59's ninth alpha build added the Ruger Mk IV, an improved version of the Mk III with a simplified disassembly procedure. 2 versions were added: a stainless Hunter model with high-contrast illuminated sights, and a Standard model with a custom integrated suppressor, known as the "Whisper" variant. As with the earlier Mk III, the Mk IVs both have simulated magazine safeties.

Ruger Mk IV Hunter - .22 LR
Examining the Hunter. A beautiful thing, it is.
The pistol's other side. Interestingly, the pistol's grip panels have nearly unaltered Ruger logo medallions embedded in them; the only change is the replacement of the "R" with a "B", which, judging by the markings on the side of the upper receiver, presumably stands for "Bugert".
Taking a look at the Hunter's red-and-yellow illuminated sights.

Whisper

Ruger Mk IV Standard - .22 LR
The Mk IV "Whisper", in all its subtle glory.
Loading in a standard 10-round magazine.
Flipping the pistol over...
...and pulling back the bolt.
Pointing the pistol at a target; lacking a front sight, the Whisper doesn't really necessitate proper aiming.
Firing the Mk IV. As the name implies, the weapon is whisper-quiet.
Setting down the now-empty Whisper.

SIG-Sauer P250 Compact

The compact version of the SIG-Sauer P250 is one of the available firearms in-game. It has a two-tone finish, is chambered in .45 ACP, and was added in Update #5.

Early Model SIG-Sauer P250 Compact with two-tone finish - 9x19mm
Admiring the P250, amidst a selection of other handguns.
Loading in a standard 9-round magazine.
Chambering the first of the aforementioned 9 rounds.
Taking aim at a target...
...and firing.
A P250 fitted with a laser and a red-dot sight. The latter is no longer possible; it was found that detachable slide-mounted red-dot sights had serious zeroing problems, so the feature was removed, leaving the player's only options for RDSed handguns either the use of a wrap-around rail mount or one of the pistols with a fixed red-dot sight.

Seburo Compact-eXploder

Update #57 added one firearm, the Compact-eXploder machine pistol, made by Japanese science fiction mangaka Masamune Shirow's fictional arms company Seburo. In-game, the weapon is referred to as the "SCX" (i.e. Seburo Compact-eXploder), and fires the 4.6x30mm HK round (its caliber never being specified in the original source material).

Airsoft replica of the Seburo Compact-eXploder pistol seen in the manga Appleseed. This is a conversion kit for the Maruzen PPK/S airsoft gun made by Dai-Nihon Giken Poseidon.
Examining the SCX. A rather well-done model for a gun that doesn't actually exist.
The right side of the pistol, which looks more or less the same as the left.
Taking a look at one of the Seburo's distinctive curved magazines, which shows off the white-tipped (armor-piercing incendiary tracer) 4.6mm rounds within. These magazines hold 15 rounds, presumably due to them being single-stack.
Loading in the aforementioned magazine.
Lining up the Compact-eXploder's high-set sights...
...and sending out a 15-round burst.

Thompson Center Arms Contender

The 12th alpha build of Update #52 added a Thompson Center Arms Contender pistol chambered in .45-70 Government, with a curious combination of a wooden forearm and a synthetic grip. Interestingly, it uses the same code-base as the earlier-added Orion Flare Gun, due to the near-identical manual of arms.

Thompson Center Arms Contender - .45-70 Government
When faced with the threat of a giant evil hotdog trying to monetize Christmas, always keep your handcannon handy.
Opening up the breech.
Loading in a jacketed hollow-point .45-70 round. Several other types were added as well, including soft-points, wadcutters, and solid-brass Lehigh Defense Xtreme Penetrator rounds.
Cocking the hammer.
Aiming; the Contender in-game is meant to be used with optics, and as such doesn't actually have any iron sights.
This doesn't actually prevent you from hitting your target, however, as the headless fellow in the bottom-left of the shot can attest to.

Tokarev TT-33

The Tokarev TT-33 is one of the available firearms in-game. It was the first "real" handgun added (barring the fictitious "Cyber Pistol"), and predates H3's release altogether; it was one of the few weapons included in the very first early access build of the game.

Tokarev TT-33 - 7.62x25mm Tokarev. Pre-1947 version.
Launching right into things, by lining up a TT-33 over a magazine...
...and slamming it down onto the table.
Giving the slide a good, solid yank.
Examining the TT-33; bright lights and refinished bluing do not mix well with human eyes.
Firing off a few shots at nothing in particular.
Performing a quick swap-out of the magazine, which shows off the TT's oddly chunky aftermarket grips. It also shows that the reload was merited; the indicator holes on the side reveal that the magazine only contains 4 rounds.
Okay, now you're just being silly.
One may have noticed that the pistol in the previous shots remained uncocked at all times, despite the TT-33 being single-action-only. Those shots were from an earlier build of the game; Update #3 fixed the issue.
Which is, y'know.
Nice.
The TT-33's iron sights.

...what? Were you expecting something that actually fits into the section and flows well? Nope. Too bad. This is all you get.

Volcanic Repeater

The Volcanic Repeater is one of the firearms added in the Wurstworld update. It's based on an early Smith and Wesson produced Navy model, with iron frame over the later brass frame, and is chambered for .41 caliber "Rocket Ball" rounds, which are (correctly) rather anemic.

Volcanic Repeating Arms "Navy" Pistol - .41 Rocket Ball
While out in Wurstworld, you have to admire the detail in the Volcanic.
Opening the Volcanic's magazine tube. A notable error is that the follower tab (the small projection sticking off of the end of the tube) is always in the pushed-forward position, meaning that there is nothing actually pushing the rounds in the magazine towards the action.
Loading in some .41 caliber rounds...
...which, fortunately enough, do show up in the tube.
Chambering a round in the Volcanic.
Taking aim with the Volcanic's rather small sights.
Flip-cocking the Volcanic. This is one of two ways that the weapon can be used in-game; the other is holding it with two hands and working the action normally, which is much more practical, but much less cool-looking.

Walther P22

Update #58 added a two-toned Walther P22 pistol.

Walther P22 - .22 LR
Loading a 10-round magazine into the P22...
...before pausing to admire it. Unlike the reference image above, H3's P22 has a green frame.
Also unlike the reference image, the in-game P22 lacks the Walther banner logo stamp on the front of the slide, due to the typical copyright concerns.
Racking the Walther's slide.
Aiming through the sights; while holding a handgun so close to one's own face would normally be rather inadvisable, with the short slide travel and minimal recoil of a .22, it's really not that much of an issue.
See?
Failing nearly all its classes, the empty magazine decides to just drop out and join a trade school.

Walther P38

The Walther P38 was added in the 11th alpha of Update #52.

Walther P38 - 9x19mm Parabellum
Examining the P38. Note the Bakelite grips, which show this to be a wartime model.
Loading in a magazine. For some odd reason, the indicator holes in the magazine aren't actually holes, and as such don't show the magazine's contents.
Racking the slide.
Taking a look at the sights...
...before receiving a vision from 8 rounds in the future.

Walther P38K

Along with the full-size variant, the short-barreled Walther P38K was added in Update #52's 11th alpha.

Walther P38K - 9x19mm Parabellum
The two P38s resting side-by-side on a table.
"Hey, where'd the rest of it go?"
Taking a close look at the P38K's muzzle, in a rather inadvisable fashion.

Walther PPK

The Walther PPK was added to the game with the release of the 1st Meatmas update.

Walther PPK - 9x17mm Browning, AKA .380 ACP
While debuting a few new guns, you have to pause for one of the most famous pocket pistols.
Loading a magazine into the PPK. Unlike a certain someone's PPK, this gun is chambered for 9x17mm, rather than 7.65x17mm, which gives it a 6-shot capacity.
Chambering a round.
Aiming the pistol. The sights are rather small, but that's the price you pay for having something concealable.
Firing a .380 round at the target.
Unfortunately, that grouping just won't cut it. You'll need to get a far better score on the test if you want to get your license to kill.

Revolvers

Chiappa Rhino

Update #39 added the Chiappa Rhino to the game's arsenal; rather than simply choosing one version, H3 made the rather impressive choice of adding all of them - the 20DS, the 40DS, the 50DS, and the 60DS.

Chiappa Rhino 60DS - .357 Magnum
We've got Papa Rhino...
Chiappa Rhino 50DS - .357 Magnum
...Mama Rhino...
Chiappa Rhino 40DS - .357 Magnum
...Junior Rhino...
Chiappa Rhino 20DS - .357 Magnum
...and the ever-adorable Baby Rhino.
One big, happy Rhino family. Cue the impossible-to-get-out-of-your-head intro theme!
Right, enough hoping for more good family-based sitcoms. Back to work.
Loading the 60DS with a speedloader; this 6-shot .357 speedloader was added along with the Rhino, since the Rhino was the first 6-shot .357 added to H3.
Cocking the Rhino's "hammer"...
...which immediately falls back forward, because it's not actually a hammer. This is one of the Rhino's unique features; instead of an external hammer, it has a shrouded hammer with an external cocking lever, which is always down (regardless of the hammer's position), unless it's actively being pulled back.
Attempting to scare a target into submission with a well-executed Harries technique (which actually works in-game; 2-handed handgun stabilization can be performed with certain objects in the off-hand, including flashlights).
With this inevitably failing, seeing as paper targets are only scared of the FBI technique, other methods become necessary.
Papa Rhino spills his spent casings all over himself, while a laugh track plays in the background NO. Just accept it, man. We're never going to have another That 70's Show. Just move on.

Colt Single Action Army

Update #42 made the Colt SAA available for use in-game, specifically the 5.5" barreled model; this was the first single-action revolver added to H3. Of note is that the weapon will fire if it is dropped on the hammer, provided that the hammer is uncocked and resting on a loaded chamber. This interesting, realistic touch is a trait shared by the other single-action revolvers added to the game later, including the Reichsrevolver M1879 and the Nagant M1895.

The SAA was actually present in the game long before Update #42, albeit not in physical form; the "Amendment 35" poster in the indoor shooting range features 2.

Colt Single Action Army with 5.5" barrel known as the "Artillery" model- .45 Long Colt
Pressing the appropriate touchpad key readies the weapon for loading and unloading, half-cocking the hammer and opening the loading gate.
Loading the revolver. As expected, the weapon holds more than enough rounds to kill anything that moves- which is to say, 6.
Pointing the SAA at a target.
Fanning the SAA's hammer. A fast, enjoyable way to fire, if not a terribly accurate one.
The Amendment 35 poster, as it appears in the indoor range, revolver-wielding eagle and all.
A clearer image of the poster, taken from the official RUST LTD website.

LAPD 2019 Blaster

Update #43 introduced the LAPD 2019 Blaster from Blade Runner, referring to it as the "LAPD 2019 Special" (another one of its common names). It is perhaps one of the most intricate depictions of the weapon in any piece of media (and most certainly the most complex weapon in the game):

The weapon, at its core, is a 5-shot, swing-out cylinder DAO revolver, chambered for the proprietary (and fictional) 10mm DSM (Discarding Sabot Magnetic) cartridge. This cartridge has a variety of available ammo types, including:

  • "Slugger" rounds (the weapon's default ammunition type; a hard-hitting, high-impact round),
  • Fragmentation rounds (yes, the weapon can fire grenades),
  • "Swarm" rounds (multi-projectile, shotgun-like rounds),
  • Tracer rounds
  • "Turbo Penetrator" rounds (a high-velocity armor-piercing round that doesn't impart much energy, but can penetrate a variety of targets),
  • and highly sensitive, surface-adhering, low-velocity, motion-sensitive proximity mine rounds (while the sensitivity is nice for dealing with enemies, it also means that they can be detonated by other things, including miscellaneous nearby moving objects, other proximity mines as they fly through the air, and even simply being fired in the charged mode, meaning that their sensitivity can be either a benefit or a hazard).

Furthermore, the hollow underneath the weapon's barrel is storage for the weapon's batteries (which bring the profile fully into line with the original prop, complete with LEDs that change color as the battery loses charge) used in the railgun-assisted mode, which dramatically increases muzzle velocity, at the cost of creating massive amounts of heat (as one would expect from a railgun).

To help slow the weapon's overheating, heat sinks (called "thermal clips" in-game) are placed into what was the Steyr Mannlicher Model SL's chamber on the original prop (the bolt handle is turned to expose the heat sink, and pulled back to eject it if necessary); these have to be replaced regularly to prevent the weapon from overheating critically. As the weapon overheats, its barrel will begin to put off steam, then glow progressively brighter and brighter, while the accuracy and battery efficiency suffer; eventually, if the weapon reaches its highest heat level, its barrel will be permanently damaged, causing a significant drop in accuracy even after the weapon cools down.

The original prop from Blade Runner.
This weapon can either be viewed as the result of countless years of scientific research and development, or as the result of firearm kitbashing, but either way, it's undeniably beautiful.
The revolver's cylinder, open and ready for loading. Note the red dot on the ground; this is from the weapon's integrated laser sight (the small rod just to the left of the cylinder, with a red end), which is active whenever the weapon is held.
The various ammo types available for the weapon. From top to bottom: Swarm-Shot, Slugger, Fragmentation, Prox-Mine, Tracer, and Turbo-Penetrator. Decisions, decisions...
Loading the weapon up with some "Slugger" rounds.
Firing the weapon. The fact that this is a faithful recreation of the original movie prop means that it doesn't have any iron sights, though the integrated laser makes that a bit of a moot point.
As impressive as the weapon is, one can't help but feel like something's missing...
Ahh, much better!
A closeup of the battery. The color of the LEDs changes as their power is drained; they start out green, changing to yellow, orange, and eventually red when empty. The markings read "L.A.P.D. MODEL 2019 A.N.2. 10MM DSM".
Firing a charged shot from the LAPD produces some impressive particle effects. The back of the laser sight doubles as a capacitor charge indicator; when the weapon is set to auto-charge, there is a short, but noticeable, delay between shots, wherein power is drained from the battery and transferred to the capacitor.
Opening up what was once a chamber reveals the downside of this increased power is an increase in excess heat, which is stored in these heat sinks. The markings here read "MADE IN CALIFORNIA" and "10816", the latter presumably being a serial number.
Failure to replace the heat sinks frequently enough results in... this.
If this problem is ignored even further, it only gets worse; the particles close to the weapon are actually pieces of the inside of the barrel, the ejection of which has a rather predictable effect on the weapon's accuracy.
Firing a proximity mine round, whilst simultaneously ignoring just about every rule of every shooting range ever. The mine is the red hexagonal object, currently flying through the air. How an object that size can fit into a 10mm barrel is anybody's guess.
The blast of the aforementioned mine, which was detonated by throwing a spare round at it.

Nagant M1985

The Nagant M1985 was added through Update #47. It holds 7 rounds of 7.62x38mmR Nagant ammunition, of which only it uses. Notably, it is treated as single-action only, the reasons for this being twofold: the weapon was built to use the same code set as the Colt SAA and Reichsrevolver M1879, and the Nagant has a notoriously heavy trigger pull in double-action due to its unique gas-seal mechanism; while it wasn't the original intended purpose, this also allows the weapon to be effectively suppressed, a capability that is emulated in-game. This single-action behavior could also be indicative of the so-called "Private's Model" variant of the Nagant, which was in fact SAO.

Nagant M1895 - 7.62x38mmR Nagant
The Nagant in-game. An excellent choice for dealing with any approaching soldier, be they enemy or ally.
Loading in a round. The round isn't a spent casing; the brass case of the 7.62x38mm cartridge extends beyond the bullet, in order to make the gas-seal system work.
The Nagant's sights. A bit cramped, but workable.
Interestingly, the Nagant's hammer can be fanned in-game; this is likely the first piece of media wherein such a thing is done with a Nagant.
A closeup of the Nagant's cylinder, which shows an interesting detail: when the hammer is cocked...
...the cylinder actually moves forward, creating a gas-tight seal between the chamber and the barrel.
The Nagant's unique gas seal system also allows for... this.

Reichsrevolver M1879

Added through the long-awaited Update #45, the Reichsrevolver M1879 is available for use in-game, and is (understandably) the only weapon in-game to use the 10.6x25mmR cartridge.

Reichsrevolver M1879 - 10.6x25mmR German Ordnance

Smith & Wesson Model 10

A 5"-barreled Smith & Wesson Model 10 is one of the available firearms in-game, added in the Wurstworld update.

Smith & Wesson Model 10 Revolver - .38 Special
When presented with such a myriad of wheelgun options as that in Wurstworld, always opt for the gun that cost the most to order from Montgomery Ward.
Taking a look at the revolver's load- 6 rounds of .38 Special, ready for firing.
Aiming the revolver at a metal jug.
6 rounds later, it's time to use this new-fangled "ejector" technology to remove the spent cases.
Giving the now-empty revolver a spin.

Smith & Wesson Model 29

The Smith & Wesson Model 29 is one of the available firearms in-game, having been added in the very first update to the game after its release.

Smith & Wesson Model 29 revolver with 8 3/8" barrel - .44 Magnum
One of the perks of being in the middle of absolutely nowhere (A.K.A. Arizona) is that nobody can hear your groan-inducing Dirty Harry puns.
A closeup of the M29, which shows off something rather interesting:
As the controller's trigger is pulled, the revolver's trigger, hammer, and cylinder all visibly move.
Alternatively, the weapon can simply be cocked manually.
Opening the M29's cylinder...
...loading in some loose .44 Magnum rounds...
...and closing the revolver with a wince-inducing flick of the wrist. While this isn't the only way to close a revolver in H3, it's unfortunately one of the more common ones.
With that lesson in revolvery aside, the M29 is pointed at a dueling tree...
...and fired, scoring a direct hit. Such a feat would be far more impressive were the target further than 2 meters from the "Firin' Line" (yes, that's actually how it's written in-game).
Giving the revolver a twirl, full of unjustified pride.
Bringing in a full speedloader, while now residing in a place that isn't completely isolated from the rest of humanity.
While speedloaders tend to be a bit finicky, they can be managed rather easily with some practice.
Ejecting the spent casings from the revolver's cylinder, after making the indoor range's paper target feel 6 rounds of Magnum Force. (C'mon. Did you seriously think that I wasn't going to make at least one pun in this entire section?)
On a sidenote, the icon for the "Lightning Reflexes" category in M.E.A.T.S. features the M29 as well.

Smith & Wesson Model 327 R8

The Smith & Wesson Model 327 is one of the available firearms in-game, added in the 2016 Meatmas update. Uniquely, the revolver in-game is a left-handed model, the cylinder swinging out to the right instead of the left as is normally the case.

Screenshots courtesy of Reddit user Shubishu.

Smith & Wesson Model 327 Performance Center M&P R8 - .357 Magnum
Examining the R8's left side in the Proving Ground scene.
The right side, which looks much the same as the left. It's not every day that you see a revolver with rails.
And speaking of things that you don't see every day...
Loading the R8 with a proprietary 8-round speedloader.
Aiming the revolver at an armored Sosig; the R8 has luminous 3-dot sights, another unusual feature for a revolver.
Firing the R8.
Ejecting a load of spent cases (using the ejector rod, fortunately) after 8 failed attempts at Sosig-killing. To be fair, landing a shot between the Sosig's armor plates at this distance with an iron-sighted handgun is no mean feat.

Smith & Wesson Model 500

Added in the 7th alpha build of Update #59, the Smith & Wesson Model 500 makes its mark as the most powerful (per-shot) non-fictional handgun in the game.

Smith & Wesson Model 500 - .500 S&W Magnum
In awe at the size of this lad. Absolute unit.
A close-up of the behemoth's frame reveals, that, while most of the markings are gone, the "500" is still visible and intact.
Opening up the M500's cylinder, and pausing to wonder at the sheer size of the round it fires.
Loading some rounds into their chambers, which you can rent out for $500.00 a month, utilities not included OKAY WE GET IT, IT'S A BIG GUN, CAN WE MOVE ON NOW PLEASE
(Mis)aligning the sights with a Sosig's head...
...pulling back the trigger, tensing in anticipation...
...and giving the Sosig an unsolicited quadruple lobotomy. Yes, it does, in fact, kick that much.
Ejecting some spent casings, 4 rounds and just as many trips to an orthopedic surgeon later.
Attacking a downed Sosig; while there are many things that .500 S&W tracers can accomplish, piercing rifle-grade body armor isn't one of them, leaving the player little option other than to simply perpetually stunlock an enemy with the round's blunt kinetic force alone. Or just, y'know...
Shoot the bits that aren't armored.

Smith & Wesson Model 629 Stealth Hunter/686P Hybrid

One of the weapons added in the first Meatmas update was a strange hybrid of Smith & Wesson revolvers, with the overall appearance of a Model 629 Stealth Hunter, but the .357 Magnum chambering and 7-shot cylinder of a Model 686P.

Smith & Wesson Model 629 Stealth Hunter - .44 Magnum‎
Smith & Wesson Model 686P w/3" barrel - .357 Magnum
Holding the revolver at the right angle gives a good idea of just how shiny it is.
Opening the revolver's cylinder, which shows its 7-round capacity.
This, of course, necessitates a proprietary 7-round speedloader.
Sometimes, this happens. Due to the way in which speedloaders are handled in H3, with each visual round being an actual, physical, independent round, sometimes there can be one or two "odd men out".
Fortunately, there is an alternate hand pose for the revolvers, which makes this easier. It also makes loading them easier for lefties.
Snapping the cylinder back into place with a rather ill-advised flick of the wrist. Note that the revolver has not spontaneously grown an underbarrel laser; that's just an empty M1911A1 sitting on the table.
Taking aim with the... "Model 686P Stealth Hunter"? That seems like the best name. Alright, taking aim with the Model 686P Stealth Hunter.
Firing off a shot.
That shot plus 6 later, and the now-empty revolver is given a twirl.
As if this entire ordeal wasn't strange enough already, here we see a strange aspect of the ejection process. The casings appear to have either clipped back through the revolver after being ejected, or to have been spawned outside of the cylinder to begin with.
There, that's more like it.

Webley Mk. VI

The Webley Mk VI has been added with the release of Update #47. It was initially chambered for the ".454 Webley" round, a mis-writing of .455 Webley; this error was later corrected. Notably, it is also the first top-break revolver in the game.

Webley Mk. VI - .455 Webley
The Webley in-game. While its attachment point is still present, the lanyard loop on the base of the grip seems to have been removed.
The Webley broken open for loading. Due to its re-use of some existing swing-out revolver code, the extractor sadly doesn't pop up when the revolver is opened, at least for now.
Loading the Mk. VI. These are tracer rounds, hence the red tips.
Firing the Webley, heedless of the fact that this indoor range is a no-smoking zone.
Fortunately, despite the lack of a moving extractor, breaking the revolver open still produces a satisfying shower of spent casings.

Submachine Guns

AEK-919K “Kashtan”

The AEK-919K “Kashtan” is one of the available firearms in-game; it was added in the 1st Meatmas update, during the third week.

AEK-919K “Kashtan” - 9x18mm Makarov
A good look at the AEK-919K, fairly detailed for a rare submachine gun.
Loading in a magazine...
...before looking at the AEK's other side.
Extending the stock. Yes, that is as far as it goes.
Pulling the charging handle.
Taking aim...
...and spitting out a burst of 9x18mm Makarov rounds.

Beretta Model 38A

Update #52's eleventh alpha build brought along a Beretta Model 38A submachine gun.

Beretta Model 38A - 9x19mm Parabellum
Inspecting the left side of the Model 38A...
...and the right side. Note the dual triggers; on the real weapon, these control the firing mode (i.e. pulling one results in semi-auto, and pulling the other results in full-auto), but this isn't currently simulated in-game, the reason being that VR controllers don't have dual triggers.
Loading in a 30-round magazine; 10- and 20-round varieties are also available.
Pulling back the charging handle, which opens up a small window through which the table can be seen.
"Huh, guess I'd better turn off the safety..."
"Oops." Note: This is a pre-release bug; in the released version of the alpha build, this doesn't happen. So no, you can't set your safety to "look, I just broke the safety".
Taking aim at a target...
...and showing it what happens when you don't pay the pizzo. Or what happens when you're part of the Ethiopian military. Depends on which sort of 1930s Italian we're dealing with here.

Beretta Mx4 Storm

The fully-automatic variant of the earlier-added Cx4, the Beretta Mx4 Storm, was added in Update #52.

Beretta Mx4 Storm - 9x19mm Parabellum
An Mx4 in a freshly-opened weapon crate.
Admiring the Mx4's sleek, futuristic-looking lines. A lovely piece of kit, to be sure.
Unfortunately, the RNG wasn't terribly kind in this particular instance, pairing the submachine gun with a small 15-round magazine. At least it's loaded with tracers.
Loading in the aforementioned magazine.
Pulling the charging handle. While the Mx4 does have a bolt release in-game, you can't exactly take full advantage of it when the bolt is already in battery.
Blasting away at an enemy; while the muzzle flash and tracer may make it hard to see, the enemy in question is a "meatcrab", one of the enemies added with this Take & Hold level (known simply as Containment). The enemy, along with several others in the level, and the design of the level as a whole, are meant as an homage to Half-Life.
While the meatcrabs aren't much on their own, the creatures that they create are another matter altogether.
Dealing with some more "normal" enemies - here, a Weinerbot sniper learns that precise aiming isn't really necessary inside of the distance of a typical backyard game of catch.

Błyskawica

Added in the 11th alpha build of Update #52, the Błyskawica, a Polish submachine gun manufactured clandestinely under German occupation, is usable in H3.

Błyskawica - 9x19mm Parabellum
Taking a good, close look at the Błyskawica.
Loading in a magazine...
...pulling back the charging handle...
...and then pausing to get a better view of the submachine gun whose story is as ordinary as its name is pronounceable. Then, back to business as usual.
"KURWA!"

Brügger & Thomet MP9

The Brügger & Thomet MP9 was added in the 2016 Meatmas update, permanently fitted with B&T's distinctive railed suppressor. Update #46 added a version without the fixed suppressor; the suppressor was then made an attachment in Update #52, which resulted in the removal of the suppressed version.

Brügger & Thomet MP9 with stock extended - 9x19mm
Santa brought me the gift I wanted!
Running through the halls of Take & Hold with an MP9; the markings on the ejection port read: "Cal. 9x19mm" on the top line, and "SA 07-1548" (presumably a serial number) on the second.
Another angle, giving a better view of the weapon's profile.
A frantic run through the sturdy defenses of a Pacification Squad checkpoint bears worthwhile fruit, in the form of a locker with an MP9 inside. The checkpoints guard some of the game's strongest military-grade loot, with most of what's found outside being civilian-oriented.
Loading a fresh magazine into the MP9.
Pulling back the distinctive AR-15-style charging handle.
Grabbing a few spare magazines.
A good look at the submachine gun's left side; note the small switch just above the grip, which is pushed up when the weapon is set to safe...
...pushed down when the weapon is set to semi-auto...
...and seemingly disappears when it's set to full-auto.

Cobray M11/9

A Cobray M11/9 was added through Update #50, AKA the 2017 Meatmas Update.

SWD/Cobray M11/9 - 9x19mm Parabellum
A Cobray M11/9 sitting in a weapon case, along with a suppressor and some magazines.
Attaching a suppressor to the Cobray.
Loading in a drum magazine...
...pulling back the bolt...
...and firing the Cobray. Note the burning trees in the background; the drum magazine in the case comes loaded with incendiary rounds by default.

CZ Scorpion Evo 3 A1

Another much-requested addition, the CZ Scorpion Evo 3 A1 was introduced in Update #58.

CZ Scorpion Evo 3 A1 - 9x19mm Parabellum
Admiring the Scorpion Evo.
Loading in a 30-round magazine; with how quickly the weapon fires, these don't last long.
Pulling back the charging handle, revealing a fresh set of 30 9x19mm rounds lying in wait.
Being a military model (as opposed to one of CZ's semi-auto-only civilian offerings), the Evo 3 has 4 selector positions: safe...
...semi-auto...
...3-round burst...
...and, of course, full-auto.
Lining up the Scorpion's distinctive aperture sights.
Unleashing a 1,000+ RPM burst of target-shredding fun.
Pulling the charging handle back...
...locking it up...
...swapping magazines...
...and finishing off the reload with a not-exclusive-to-HK-anymore HK slap.

FN P90 TR

The FN P90 TR is one of the numerous weapons added in the 2016 Meatmas update.

FN P90 TR - FN 5.7x28mm
A P90 on a table, next to its rival.
Loading a magazine into the P90. This previously rather tricky process was made easier following Update #48.
Pulling back the charging handle.
Taking a look at the P90's interestingly-placed fire selector, which has 3 positions: safe...
...semi-auto...
...and, of course, full-auto. One interesting feature of the P90 that H3 simulates is its interesting behavior in full-auto; despite having a separate semi-auto setting, the P90 uses a 2-stage trigger system in full-auto mode (i.e. a partial pull of the trigger produces semi-automatic fire, whereas a full pull produces automatic fire).
"Aiming" the P90; being the "TR" (Triple Rail) model, it doesn't come with any sights by default.
Demonstrating the interesting downward-ejection system of the P90, something some games seem to be unaware of.
All that "demonstration" leave's the gun's muzzle looking rather smoky. Also note the fake shield-shaped logo under the end of the magazine; it isn't clear why it's placed there, since a normal P90 doesn't have any markings there.
Removing the empty magazine, which reveals a rather fitting reference on the top of the stock.

Gepard PDW

The Gepard PDW is one of the available submachine guns in-game, having been added in the first Meatmas update. This is also the only known appearance of this rare Russian prototype PDW in any media.

Gepard PDW with stock extended and suppressor - 9x18mm Makarov
Taking a look at the Gepard's left side...
...and the right. A pretty good-looking model for a gun this rare.
Loading in a 40-round magazine; 20-rounders are also available.
Pulling the charging handle.
Attaching the Gepard's unique suppressor.
Looking through the sights; as with the rest of the Gepard, these are rather AKS-74U-like, due to the former being based on the latter.
Sending some rounds downrange.
Folding the stock...
...and spraying rounds willy-nilly around the room.

Heckler & Koch MP5A2

A Heckler & Koch MP5A2 with a Surefire forend is one of the available firearms in-game. It was added to the game with Update #7. Update #24 made some changes, including the addition of a top rail, and the ability to adjust the sights and turn on the flashlight.

Heckler & Koch MP5A2 with Surefire 628 dedicated forend weaponlight and Navy trigger group - 9x19mm Parabellum
Examining the MP5A2.
Loading in a 30-round magazine.
Pulling the charging handle back...
...and up.
This, of course, being a setup for the glorious HK Slap.
Flicking the selector to full-auto. No, sadly, you can't do this with psychic powers.
Taking aim, using the widest (and shortest-ranged) of the MP5's 3 rear sight positions...
...and hosing down the bullseye target with a burst 9x19mm rounds.
The MP5's post-Update #24 form, complete with top rail.
The other 2 rear sight options, for those wondering, are small and far-out...
...and smaller and further out.
And on the twenty-fourth update, Anton said: "Let there be light."

Heckler & Koch MP5KA4

The Heckler & Koch MP5KA4 is one of the available firearms in-game; it was added in Update #20.

Heckler & Koch MP5KA4 - 9x19mm Parabellum
Examining the left side of the MP5KA4...
...and the right. Of note is that this appears to be the same model that would later be used in Virtual Warfighter.
A closeup of the MP5K, showing off its rail mount. In a nice touch of realism, the KA4 has a 4-position selector over the MP5A2's 3.
Loading in a 15-round magazine. The MP5A2's 30-rounders can also be used in the MP5K, and vice versa.
Pulling back the cocking handle.
Aiming at the target...
...and firing. Between this and the kung-fu he knows, the invisible-handed protagonist is a dangerous man. Lobby guards beware.

Heckler & Koch MP5K-PDW

Between the release of Update #9 (when it was added) and Update #20 (when it was removed), the game's MP5K was actually a stockless MP5K-PDW, as identified by the distinctive muzzle device. It was replaced by the MP5KA4 due to inaccuracies in the model, many of which were magazine-related.

Heckler & Koch MP5K-PDW - 9x19mm Parabellum
The pre-patch MP5K-PDW, in all of its not-so-glorious glory.
Loading in a 30-round magazine.
Chambering one of the 30 aforementioned rounds.
Flipping the selector lever to full-auto. When we said there "magazine-related" issues, this is what we meant.
Taking some potshots at the paper bullseye.

Heckler & Koch MP5SD1

The only strictly-dedicated suppressed weapon usable by enemies, the Heckler & Koch MP5SD1 is currently not a standard player-usable weapon (bar its limited functionality as a "Sosigun" ).

Heckler & Koch MP5SD1 - 9x19mm Parabellum
A Sosig carrying an MP5SD1. Unlike many of their other weapons, the MP5 seemingly lacks a trigger guard.
An MP5SD1 on the ground...
...and another one hovering ominously next to a Sosig.
The enemy firing its MP5SD1; in spite of the suppressor, it still produces a full-sized muzzle flash.
Returning fire at another Sosig with the now-captured MP5SD1. Note the ejection port; this contains a bolt that visibly reciprocates when the weapon is fired. Also note the object at the weapon's front end, which appears to be either a somewhat stretched-out front sight hood without an actual sight, or possibly (though less likelily) a Truglo-esque red-dot sight.
The updated MP5SD1, complete with ribbed handguard, non-solid front sight protector, and trigger guard.
The Pacification Squad Sosigs, added in Update #62 (AKA Module 2 of the Return of the Rotweiners gamemode) use suppressed weapons (both MP5SD1s and suppressed versions of other weapons) fitted with visible laser sights, as seen in this rather awkward bit of CQC. The lasers would seem to run contrary to the purpose of the suppressors (although it could be argued that the Zosigs would be more attracted to gunshots than to red laser beams); this is simply in the name of balance, as being caught off-guard by a Pacification Squad patrol would likely mean near-instant death.
The lasers seem to be activated by pressure switches (seeing as they're only active when being held), but yet neither pressure switches nor the actual lasers are visible on any of the weapons themselves; this MP5SD's laser apparently sees fit to instead just appear from the bottom of the handguard.

Heckler & Koch MP7A1

The Heckler & Koch MP7A1 is one of the numerous weapons added in the first Meatmas update.

Heckler & Koch MP7A1 with Zeiss Z-Point red dot sight and 40-round magazine - 4.6x30mm
While browsing the arsenal, always start off small.
Affixing an Aimpoint sight to the MP7A1's upper rail, while noticing a bit of temporal distortion.
Loading a 40-round magazine into the MP7A1.
A closeup of the already-loaded magazine, which shows off the bottlenecked shape of the 4.6x30mm rounds. Note the black tips, which indicate that these are of the armor-piercing variety.
Giving the iron sights a try.
Of course, in order to allow this, you first have to unfold them.
Yes, the front one that was already unfolded too.
Firing the MP7A1...
...aiming it...
...and remembering to chamber a round. When? Never. Because it already happened. And it never will. Got it? No? Good.

Heckler & Koch UMP45

The Heckler & Koch UMP45 is one of the available firearms in-game; it was added in Update #7, along with the MP5A2. Prior to the release of Update #52, it was permanently fitted with a vertical foregrip.

Heckler & Koch UMP45 - .45 ACP
Some people would say that firing 2 submachine guns at once is a bad idea. We call those people weak.
Scrutinizing the UMP45.
Flipping the fun switch to rock 'n roll, on the basis that semi-auto is for squares.
Unloading the UMP at a target. One-handed, no less.
Replacing the old magazine with a new one.
Inspecting the other side of the submachine gun, which shows that the bolt is locked open.
Addressing this issue by pulling the charging handle. Note the bolt release button; this is another means by which a locked-back bolt can be released, and it even correctly pops up when the bolt is locked back, as seen here.
Ventilating the target again, this time while actually aiming.
Folding the UMP's stock, just for the fun of it.

IMI Micro Uzi

Update #54 added an IMI Micro Uzi to H3's collection; the weapon was, however, present in-game long before then, being featured on the icon for the "Spray & Pray" category in the MEATS (Modular Environment Adaptive Target Simulation) game mode.

IMI Micro Uzi with bent trigger guard - 9x19mm Parabellum
The "Spray & Pray" category's icon. Oddly, despite having as subtle a detail as appropriate compensator cuts in the muzzle, the weapon lacks a charging handle.
Unfolding the Micro Uzi's stock...
...before taking a moment to appreciate its newfound physicality.
Loading a magazine into the Micro Uzi.
Pulling back the charging handle.
Taking a close look at the receiver, which shows off the markings.
It also shows off the weapon's seemingly somewhat poor condition, considering the denting present in the weapon's metal components.
And, of course, it shows off the fire selector.
Taking a look through the Micro Uzi's rather simple aperture sights. Aiming such a small, short-stocked weapon so steadily and close-up was made far easier with the addition of the optional Virtual Stock system, added in the same update as the Micro Uzi itself.
This, coupled with Update #52's rebuild of recoil systems with relation to shouldering weapons makes compact submachine guns such as this one far more usable for roles other than point-blank one-handed spray-and-pray.
And yet, the irresistible urge remains.

IMI Mini Uzi

Along with the full-size versions, the IMI Mini Uzi was added in Update #59's ninth alpha build.

IMI Mini Uzi - 9x19mm Parabellum
Examining a Lil' Uzi. Unlike the more common Vert or Horizont variants, this appears to be a rarer Lil' Uzi Diag.
Loading in a 32-round magazine.
Comparing the Mini Uzi to a full-sized one, which gives an idea of just how "mini" it is.
Taking a look at the weapon's right side, which gives a good view of the folded stock.
Unfolding said stock...
...which produces this.
Pulling the weapon's top-mounted charging handle.
No, that's not how you...
At least they're still doing the same needlessly dramatic removal of their empty magazines.

IMI Uzi

The full-size variant of the Uzi was added to H3 in the tenth alpha of Update #52, as an optional weapon for SWBs. According to its Sosigun spawn menu name, it's chambered in .45 ACP, an available (though less common) option. In the 9th alpha of Update #59, two player-usable versions were added: the solid-stocked "Classic", and the folding-stocked "Compact".

IMI Uzi w/later-pattern wooden stock - 9x19mm Parabellum
Admiring the wooden-stocked Uzi.
A seldom-seen sight, and all the more welcome for it.
Loading in a magazine. Unlike the Sosigs' .45 ACP Uzis, this one is a far more common 9x19mm version.
Pulling back the charging handle.
Looking at the fire selector's 3 positions: safe...
...semi-auto...
...and what everyone thinks of when they hear the word "Uzi".
Looking through the Uzi's aperture/post sights. A little bit obtrusive, but perfectly suitable for the weapons' intended purpose.
Opening fire. The Uzi's renowned controllability carries over quite well into H3.
IMI Uzi - 9x19mm Parabellum
An Uzi-wielding bot belatedly realizes that he picked the wrong house.
Getting a fair bit closer to an Uzi-wielding bot than is strictly advisable reveals the rather surprising level of detail it features: it has a charging handle, an ejection port, and even a modeled rear sight aperture, despite the fact that, as mentioned, nobody is meant to be getting this close to a bot for long enough to actually notice this. Meanwhile, one of the bot's incredibly bright tracers provides this shot with a bit more flair.
Wounded and dazed, a Sosig drops its Uzi on the floor.
Stealing the Uzi, and putting the poor thing out of its misery. The abnormally bright flash of light seen here is caused by the impact of an API (armor-piercing incendiary) round; this effect is part of the rebuild of tracers (and ballistics in general) that occurred in Update #59.
Another part of this rebuild is the migration of enemy weapons over to the new tracer system, as demonstrated by this unwilling test subject. Note that, as with their MAC-11s, enemies' Uzis strangely fire from a closed bolt with a reciprocating charging handle; it's even stranger here than it is on the MAC, however, as the Uzi's charging handle doesn't reciprocate (a fact which, as the Micro Uzi above demonstrates, the developers were aware of).
The updated Uzi; gone are the flat, matte-gray surfaces, along with the sights. And, while it's not visible here, the reciprocation of the charging handle.
The far more commonly-seen folding-stocked Uzi.
Perfect for all of your president-defending needs.
Unfolding the stock.
In case you were worried that that was the stock at full extension, rest assured that it is not; this is.
IMI Uzi w/Sionics suppressor - 9x19mm Parabellum
Added along with the Uzis was this unique Sionics 2-stage suppressor, commonly associated with the Uzi.
Unfortunately, the fact that it fits over the barrel makes attaching it a bit... tricky. Here, for example, the collision hitboxes of the suppressor and barrel fight one another, while the game attempts to determine whether or not the suppressor is in the right position to make the barrel invisible (which is supposed to happen when it's attached).
There we go.
With that ordeal out of the way, it's back to ventilating the target.

Interdynamic KG-9

A full-auto converted Interdynamic KG-9 is one of the available firearms in-game; it features the same strange strange paintjob as the TEC-9. It is referred to as a modified version of the latter; it initially was, until Update #53 converted it from closed-bolt to open-bolt, effectively turning it into an earlier open-bolt KG-9.

Interdynamic KG-9 - 9x19mm

"Kalashniluger"

The second variant of the Luger coming to the game in Update #52 is a downright bizarre modification of the P08, which has a considerable amount of AKM parts attached to it, including a stock, a handguard (with a Soviet-type dovetail rail on the side), a set of sights, and a barrel and gas tube, the latter of which actually contains the weapon's barrel; a hole has been placed in the front sight tower for this to fire through. As if that weren't ridiculous enough, it is also fully-automatic, which, due to the Luger's toggle-locked action, leads to a downright absurd rate of fire.

However, perhaps the strangest thing about this weapon is that it actually exists. Made by German custom gun shop Waffen Werle, it is exactly what was described - an automatic Luger modded out with AKM parts.

Custom automatic Luger with AKM parts by Waffen Werle - 9x19mm Parabellum
what
why
how
no
stop
please
I beg you

Kedr PP-91

The Kedr PP-91 is one of the available firearms in-game. It was added in Update #19; Update #24 gave it some changes, including a 2-setting rear sight and a side-mounted Picatinny rail.

Kedr PP-91 - 9x18mm Makarov
While going through the new lineup, always be sure to have a look at the machine pistols on offer.
Also be sure to unfold their stocks.
And to chamber them.
And, of course to take some time to admire them.
How wonderfully simple.
Don't forget to switch them from "Safe"...
...to "something in Cyrillic that probably means semi-auto"...
...to "something else in Cyrillic that probably means full-auto".
Aiming; this would be far more conducive to actually hitting something were the post visible through the rear sight actually the front sight post, and not the front sight's left protective ear.
Not that that ever stopped anyone from trying.
Taking a look at Update #24's, well, updates...
...these being an optional aperture setting for the rear sight...
...and a somewhat oddly-placed rail. While it might not seem terribly useful, it makes a great spot for lights and lasers, and the game's canted rail adapters be used to turn it into a top rail for optics.

M1928 Thompson

Update #52's laundry list of new weapons included the M1928 Thompson submachine gun, complete with optional 50- or 100-round drum magazines.

M1928 Thompson with 50-round drum magazine - .45 ACP
Admiring the Thompson.
Locking back the bolt. H3 correctly shows that this is necessary in order to insert a drum magazine.
Loading in a 50-round drum.
"It's simple math, buddy. Twice the bullets, half the wiseguys. 's all there is to it."

M1A1 Thompson

Added through Update #50, the classic M1A1 Thompson is usable.

M1A1 Thompson - .45 ACP
A Thompson in a weapon case, along with a magazine.
A good look at the weapon's model. The separate safety and fire selector are correctly simulated in-game; they are currently set to safe, as is the case when a weapon is first spawned. Also note the receiver's markings; the first line reads "THOMPSON SUBMACHINE GUN", the second "CALIBER .45 M1A1", and the third "NO. 287404".
Locking back the M1A1's bolt.
Attempting to line up the sights. "Attempting" being the key word here; the M1A1's heavy vertical recoil can make keeping it on target extremely challenging.
Removing an empty magazine, after a considerable amount of snowflake shooting. While it's not very visible here, the rounds do, in fact, visibly disappear from the indicator holes in the sides. Also note the floor being visible through the magazine well. This is not, as one may initially suspect, a missing texture; rather, it is actually a view through the ejection port.
Upon flipping the weapon over, one discovers that the aforementioned view through the ejection port is made possible by the Thompson's bolt hold-open; unlike many open-bolt firearms, if a Thompson is dry-fired with a magazine inserted (i.e. when the trigger is held after firing the last shot in full-auto), the bolt will not go forwards.
And, of course, what better way to celebrate the presence of bolt hold-open devices than to fire randomly at absolutely everything.

M3 "Grease Gun"

Along with the Thompson, Update #50 added the M3 "Grease Gun" to H3.

M3 "Grease Gun" - .45 ACP
The M3 Grease Gun, attempting to blend in with the foam lining of its weapon case.
Loading a magazine into the M3.
Popping open the dustcover.
Operating the M3's unusual cocking lever; the later M3A1 would replace this with a hole in the bolt for the user to stick their finger into.
"Greasing" the snowy landscape.
Aiming through the M3's sights. The relatively clear sight picture, coupled with the low rate of fire, make this weapon rather easy to keep on target.

Suppressed M3

Update #51 added a variant with the OSS-type integral suppressor; while this isn't necessarily impossible, suppressors were more common on the later M3A1 variant. This choice was likely made to reuse most of the existing M3 model. The update also made the previously permanently-collapsed stock extendable.

M3A1 "Grease Gun" with integral suppressor - .45 ACP
Loading a magazine into the suppressed M3. The cloth wrapping that is normally present on the suppressor is absent from the in-game model.
Cocking the M3, showing that this isn't an M3A1 like the reference image above.
Opening fire on the bullseye.

MAC-11

The MAC-11 is one of the available firearms in-game, having been added to the game in its infancy- all the way back in Update #4. Following Update #46, SWBs can now make use of these.

RPB Industries M11A1 - .380 ACP
Having felt that his life was missing a bit of bees, our nameless, handless, faceless, intangible, and generally nonexistent protagonist decides to remedy this problem, with the aid of 32 .380 ACP rounds.
Admiring the now-loaded bee machine.
Pulling back the charging handle...
...before looking at the other side. This shows off the weapon's open-bolt nature; the MAC-11 was the first open bolt weapon in H3, and the only one until the addition of the Sten a whopping 45 updates later.
Upon attempting to fire the MAC-11, our favorite literally nobody finds it distinctly lacking in apodiean output; a close look at the left side reveals the culprit: the ever-nefarious safety lever. This view also shows off the markings on the side; in addition to the "SAFE" and "FIRE" markings at the front, and the largely correct logo at the rear, the markings under the ejection port are legible, and read "INGEM M11. CAL 9MM AUTO" on the first line, "MILITARY ARMAMENT CORP" on the second, and "POWDER SPRINGS GA, USA" on the third.
Having remedied the above issue, our protagonist finally gets the satisfying sound that he oh-so desired.
One empty magazine (and one ventilated target) later, our hero belatedly realizes that this would've made actually firing the MAC-11 considerably easier.
A hapless MAC-wielding Weinerbot ambles into an objective in Take & Hold mode, clearly unaware of what awaits.
Another bot prepares to meet an equally unfortunate end. It isn't entirely clear what the bot was hoping to accomplish with an uncocked, triggerless weapon.
A Sosig with a menagerie of weapons, a MAC-11 among them.
Grabbing the Sosig's MAC...
...and firing it at nothing in particular. Unlike its normal counterpart, the MAC-11 used by bots is shown as closed-bolt, for whatever reason.
A pair of bot-used MAC-11s.
Shredding a Sosig with the submachine guns' absurd rate of fire.
Of all the Sosiguns, the MAC-11 was easily the least changed (receiving little more than an update to its textures), probably in large part because it already looked like a flat-sided box to begin with.

MP40

Added through Update #50, the MP40 is available for use in H3VR.

MP40 - 9x19mm
The MP40, sitting pretty in a weapon case.
Loading a fresh magazine into the MP40.
Locking the bolt into the safety notch.
Aiming the MP40 at a crystal snowflake.
Making this idyllic scene a whole lot less so, with the aid of 32 rounds of 9x19mm.

PASAM

The second of Update #52's 3 C96 variants is a derivative of the above Schnellfeuer, and a rather curious one at that: a Brazilian PASAM submachine gun, modified with a top rail and a Vz. 61 Skorpion-esque top-folding stock.

The model itself is a publicly-available 3D asset by weapon artist Stefan Engdahl, going by the name "Mauser Assault Carbine" and sold on CG Trader alongside all the other C96 variants seen in-game as the "Mauser Pistol Pack." It is a strange hybrid which appears to be based on a photograph of a converted airsoft gun, with a standard C96 pistol grip like a Mod 1 PASAM but the barrel shroud attached to the top of the magazine housing rather than all along it, with a vaguely Thompson-like foregrip which is not really like either PASAM variant, and the folding wire stock which no variant had (the 2nd variant of the PASAM only had a fixed wire stock). On ArtStation, Engdahl acknowledged that it's a modification of his Mauser M712 model he made for fun.

PASAM Mod 1 - 7x63x25mm Mauser
Behold, the PASAM...ish.
Unfolding the stock.
With that sorted, it's time to load in a magazine...
...chamber a round...
...and open fire.

PP-19 Bizon-2

The PP-19 Bizon-2 is one of the available firearms in-game. It was added in Update #18; upon its release, it was permanently fitted with a side-mounted Picatinny rail adaptor, but this was made into an attachment in Update #40. It is chambered in 9x19mm Parabellum, and as such, holds 53 rounds.

PP-19 Bizon-2 - 9x18mm Makarov
All 4 of Update #18's additions conveniently laid out on a table, with the Bizon at the far left.
Taking a look at one of the Bizon's distinctive helical magazines. The ribbed design of these, along with certain features of the gun itself, help distinguish this particular Bizon as a later -2 model.
Loading the aforementioned magazine into the gun.
Remember, kids: always be sure to check your Russian submachine guns to make sure that there isn't any leftover communism stuck in there. Even if they were first produced in the nineties, you still can't be sure unless you check.
A closeup of the muzzle end of the PP-19. This shows off both the muzzle brake and the position of the front magazine catch, both of which further peg it as a Bizon-2.
A cursory glance at the selector switch reveals that it's set to semi-auto. But why would you do that...
...when you could set it to full-auto?
Racking the charging handle.
Aiming; the rail bracket makes this a bit more difficult, though not necessarily impossible. It also makes it distinctly more difficult (though, again, still possible) to see the redesigned sights of the Bizon-2.
Pulling the Bizon's trigger, which causes it to somewhat anemically cough up a steady stream of spent brass.
Reviewing the resultant grouping; considering the distance, it's not great, but then again, who needs accuracy when you've got volume of fire?
Folding up the stock...
...which makes the already compact weapon even shorter.
Unfortunately, the rail bracket ruins things once again; its presence prevents the stock from actually folding all the way.

PP-2000

The PP-2000 is one of the many firearms added in the 1st Meatmas update.

PP-2000 - 9x19mm Parabellum
Examining the left side of the PP-2000...
...and the right side.
Loading in a 44-round magazine. Sadly, this can't be used as a stock, seeing as the PP-2000 in-game already has one.
Pulling back the rather G36-esque folding charging handle.
Taking not-really-aim...
...and firing anyways.
Dropping an empty magazine out of the PP-2000. But wait, what's that?
Why, it's a suppressor! One specifically meant for this weapon, in fact! And of course, that leaves only one thing to do...
...fire the weapon again, but this time at a neck-craningly impossible cinematic angle!

PPSh-41

The iconic PPSh-41 submachine gun was added through Update #50, and is capable of using either 35-round box magazines or 71-round drums.

PPSh-41 - 7.62x25mm Tokarev
The PPSh in a weapon case, along with both of its optional magazines. The 35-round box magazine isn't unusually short; it's just clipping through the front of the case, due to a physics engine bug.
Loading a box magazine into the PPSh. Note the fire selector, currently set to semi-auto.
Pulling back the bolt.
Aiming at a snowflake. The fine front sight is nice for aiming, but can be hard to make out on some backgrounds.
Loading in a 71-round drum.
Firing a definitely-necessary-and-not-in-any-way-excessive amount of rounds at a snowflake.

"PPSh-14"

A fictional version of the PPSh, also added through Update #50, this weapon is seemingly intended as a modernized variant of the original 1941 design (which, if the name is anything to go by, was designed in 2014). The model is done by Pavel Kutejnikov.

The "PPSh-14" in its weapon case.
Loading in a drum magazine. The drums that this variant comes with are slightly smaller than the standard ones, and slightly different in appearance.
A good side-on look at the PPSh-14. The odd pseudo-pistol-grip stock is rather reminiscent of some Archangel stocks.
Pulling back the bolt.
Firing the PPSh, now fitted with an Aimpoint-esque tube reflex sight.
Firing the PPSh again, this time aiming through the aforementioned sight. The previous shot was actually also taken while aiming; it does not appear so due to the fact that recordings and screenshots of Vive gameplay can only be of one eye's view- in this case, the left eye's view is shown.
This shot, on the other hand, is most definitely of unaimed fire.

"QC9 PDW" (Custom 9mm AR-15)

Added through Update #46, the "QC9 PDW" is an AR-15-patterned submachine gun chambered in 9x19mm. It appears to consist of a QC10 Colt-magazine-compatible 9mm lower, a VLTOR upper, and a Magpul MOE stock and pistol grip, among other things. In-game, it can take 3 types of magazines- a 32-round Colt-pattern stick magazine, a 32-round "waffle"-pattern polymer stick magazine, or an X-Products X-15 50-round drum magazine.

Custom AR-15 SMG with Quarter Circle 10 lower receiver and VLTOR MUR upper receiver - 9x19mm. Image provided to show the QC10 lower receiver and VLTOR upper receiver.
A good look at the QC9.
Extending the QC9's stock. Until the release of a later update, this was largely for aesthetic purposes, seeing as the stock didn't serve any real function.
A selection of magazines- the Colt-pattern metal magazine, the "waffle" polymer magazine, and the X-15 drum magazine.
Charging the QC9, loaded with a 32-round Colt-pattern magazine.
Firing the QC9, fitted with a red-dot sight; the weapon lacks any sort of sights by default.
Loading in an X-Products drum magazine.
Firing the QC9, now fitted with the aforementioned drum magazine, along with a SilencerCo suppressor. Note that the ejected case has an unstruck primer.

Sa. Vz. 61 Skorpion

The Sa. Vz. 61 Skorpion is available in H3, having been added with the M.E.A.T.S. gamemode in Update #37. The one in-game has a bit of an identity crisis; it's visually a Vz. 61, complete with curved magazines, but it's referred to as a Vz. 64, and is accordingly chambered in .380 ACP.

Sa. Vz. 61 Skorpion - .32 ACP
Having grown somewhat bored of overly flashy modified Berettas, our action hero decides to switch over to 1960's-vintage machine pistols.
Firing the Vz. 61.
Of course, being that two is one and one is none, another Skorpion is loaded up...
...and chambered.
Our action hero then opens fire, determined to clear out the lobby.
Meanwhile, in a completely different place at a time that isn't actually meanwhile, someone who isn't an action hero shows off a feature of the Skorpion that was added later:
The stock.
It's not much - little more than a bent piece of wire - but it's still nice to have.
It also makes aiming a bit easier - more due to its absence from the sight picture than its presence as a stabilizer, but again, it's still convenient. Besides, what more do you expect from a .32 submachine gun meant to be stuffed into tank crewmen's holsters?

Sten Mk. II

Update #49 added the Sten Mk II submachine gun, which marks the first time since the introduction of the MAC-11 that an open-bolt weapon was added to H3VR. Notably, the weapon's secondary grip zone (where the user's non-firing hand goes) is around the barrel shroud, meaning that, assuming it is held and fired with both hands, it is held correctly, rather than being incorrectly held by the magazine like so many games show. There is also another variation, the so-called "Mk. 9 Chopshop" variant, with a shortened barrel and a cut-down stock.

Sten Mk II - 9x19mm
The answer to the age-old question of "How little gun can you have while still having a gun?"
The weapon's other side.
Drawing back the Sten's bolt. This isn't where it rests when cocked; this is just as far back as it can be pulled.
Loading in a 32-round magazine. The update also added 16-round options.
A closeup of the ejection port, showing the magazine lined up and ready to feed cartridges.
Locking the bolt into the safety notch. This is really the only safety mechanism that the Sten has; all it does is stop the bolt from moving forwards.
Aiming through the Sten's simple aperture/post sights...
...before saying "to hell with it" and unloading full-auto from the hip.
Correction: this is the least amount of gun one can have while still technically having a gun.
After shrugging and deciding that a bare minimum amount of gun is at least better than no gun at all, the invisible point-holder loads in a magazine. Note the white tips of the rounds; these show that they are armor-piercing incendiary(!) rounds.
Firing the truncated Sten one-handed at some bots. With the stock being all but entirely removed, it's now anybody's guess as to the correct way to fire it. Then again, that statement makes the rather bold assumption that anything "correct" can be done with a sawn-off Sten.
Correct or not, the "Mk. 9 Chopshop" Sten is at least handy for closer-than-preferable encounters.

Sten Mk. V

Along with the Mk. II, Update #49 added the Sten Mk V, a later, more refined version of the Sten.

Sten Mk. V - 9x19mm
It may be more expensive than the earlier version, but at least now it's clear how it's supposed to be held.
A closeup of the muzzle, showing the wooden vertical foregrip and the Lee-Enfield-type front sight.
A look at the other side reveals the first of 32 9x19mm rounds ready to be fired.

Sten Mk. VI(S)

The integrally suppressed variant of the Mk. V, the Sten Mk VI(S), is available as well.

Sten Mk. VI(S) - 9x19mm
A weapon for the strong, silent type. Or for SOE operatives.
Firing the Mk. VI(S). Note the somewhat worrying lack of a front sight.

Steyr MP34

The final SMG added to the game by Update #50 is the Steyr MP34.

Steyr MP34 - 9x19mm
Loading a magazine into the MP34.
Taking in the beauty of an inter-war submachine gun.
Pointing the MP34 at a target. This endeavor would prove fruitless, seeing as the weapon isn't cocked.
Remedying the aforementioned issue.
Firing the MP34 properly...
...and improperly.

TDI Vector

The TDI Vector is one of the firearms added in Update #37. 2 variants of the weapon were initially available in-game: a standard one, and one fitted with the barrel shroud and extended barrel of the CRB civilian carbine variant, though still possessing the trigger and 120-degree safety of a Gen I version; Update #52 made an attachable suppressor out of the extended barrel's shroud, before Update #53 turned it into a shrouded barrel extension, and removed the now-redundant long-barreled Vector. Both are fitted with a factory AR-15 stock adaptor, attached to which is an aftermarket stock; they were also initially fitted with non-removable vertical foregrips, until Update #52 made foregrips into attachments, and removed them from any weapons that initially had them.

Gen II KRISS USA Vector CRB Enhanced - .45 ACP
TDI / KRISS USA Vector with stock removed - .45 ACP. Image provided to show the separate safety switch and selector of a military model; compare with the images above and below.
After buying his CRB, our resident mall ninja gets the feeling that he's missing something...
"Hmm..."
"What could it be, what could it be..."
"Oh, right. That's... kinda important."
Of note is the Vector's safety/fire selector setup:
The rear lever, manipulated with the firing hand, toggles between safe and whatever firemode is currently selected: here, semi-auto...
...here, 2-round burst...
...and here, full-auto.
Satisfied with his choice, the mall ninja loads in a "25+" magazine (which holds 25 rounds in-game, the lower end of the possible capacity range for these magazines).
He then pulls the Vector's distinctive folding charging handle...
...and spits fire into the darkness, the spent casings shimmering a dark, glossy black in the sparse lighting of the room, while the editor begins to realize that they're slowly becoming a drama novelist.
The normal, unshrouded version of the Vector, in a far less noir-inspiring setting.

Shotguns

Baikal MP-155K

Added in the firearms drop in Update #59's ninth alpha build, the Baikal MP-155K (a semi-automatic, magazine-fed sporting shotgun of Russian origin) makes its first documented media appearance in H3VR.

Baikal MP-155K - 12 gauge
An MP-155K sits on a table, while its magazine stands alone.
"Reunited, and it feels so good..."
Pulling back the charging handle...
...and letting it slam back into battery, taking a fresh buckshot shell with it.
Pausing to admire the shotgun's black, shiny polymer components.
The other side of the MP-155K; the markings simply read "MP-155K" in the segment closer to this text, and "12x76" in the segment closer to the ejection port (the latter is a caliber designation; it denotes shells 12 gauge in diameter and 76 millimeters in length, or 3" for those on the other side of the anywhere).
Aiming; the small, high-mounted rear aperture seems more at home on a rifle than a shotgun. At least it's good for slugs.
Firing a shell.

Benelli M4 Super 90

The Benelli M4 Super 90 is one of the available shotguns in-game; it was added in Update #6, along with the FABARM Martial.

Benelli M4 Super 90 with 4-shot tube - 12 gauge
Out on a woods walk, Hick-not45 loads up his M4 Super 90.
Aiming through the attached EOTech holosight; the in-game sight is marked "NAVTech", for copyright reasons.
Smoking some pots.
Satisfied, Hick-not45 lowers his Benelli, giving the viewers at home a good look at the 4-shot magazine tube; this is at odds with its in-game 7+1 capacity.
Meanwhile, in a far less inviting-looking shooting range, another M4 sits on a table.
Locking back the shotgun's bolt...
...chamberloading a shell...
...and letting the bolt slam into battery.
Collapsing the stock.
Admiring the now-smaller shotgun - or, at least, attempting to, as the weapon's eye-searingly reflective finish makes looking at it with this lighting for any substantial period of time a rather painful endeavor.
Blasting away a blue circle. This is the older version of the Modular Range, which would later evolve into the M.E.A.T.S. range; the former was far simpler than the latter, having only 2 types of targets (at this stage of development): blue point targets, and red penalty targets.

Beretta DT11

The Beretta DT11 is one of the 4 shotguns added in Update #15. Following Update #46, 2 new variants were added - one with a shortened set of barrels, and one with further-shortened barrels and a cut-down stock.

Beretta DT11 - 12 gauge
It was at this moment that he realized that an indoor range is not a good place to bring a trap shooting shotgun.
Deciding to just roll with it, he opens up the DT11...
...and further fails to understand its intended purpose.
Having given his DT11 two shells full of buckshot, he then closes it up.
Aiming; this being a competition skeet gun, it has nothing but a front bead sight.
Firing off a shot; the red lines in the air are the game's optional bullet trails.
He then admires his DT11, whilst trying to ignore the ricochet that has seemingly lodged itself in his leg.
Dropping the spent shells out of the DT11.
A table full of (almost) all of Update #46's shortened weapon variants.
Finding the full-length version too long and awkward for indoor use, he tries out a shorter version. Note that, despite the barrels being ostensibly sawn down, they still have choke tubes installed.
Loading the shortened DT11 up with some shells.
Sawing off a beautiful shotgun like this should be a crime. And it is. No, seriously.
Fortunately, since nobody knows who "He" is, He can't get arrested by the BATFS (Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms, and Sausages).

Heckler & Koch FABARM Martial Pro Forces

The H&K FABARM Martial Pro Forces is one of the available firearms in-game. It was the game's first pump-action shotgun, and is tied with the Benelli M4 Super 90 for the game's first 12-gauge shotgun, both having been added in Update #6.

Fabarm Martial Pro Forces 14" - 12 gauge
Feeling a need to prove itself, the FABARM shoves itself center-stage.
Loading the first shell into the chamber...
...and the other 5 into the magazine tube.
Aiming the shotgun, not that it's particularly necessary at this distance.
Blasting the target with a full load of buckshot.
Working the shotgun's action, and ejecting a spent shell.
A closeup of the receiver, which shows off the markings.
It also provides a good view of the old shell being extracted from the chamber...
...and the new one being chambered. Note the green color of the shell; the current build of H3 doesn't contain any green shells, but these screenshots predate the addition of multiple types of shotgun ammunition in Update #15.

Franchi SPAS-12

The Franchi SPAS-12 is one of the available firearms in-game, added in Update #24. 2 variants are available - a standard model with a folding stock, and a stockless model with a rail system and spare shell holder. Highly unusually for a video game, the SPAS-12's dual-mode semi-auto/pump-action functionality is depicted in H3, even more unusually with its intended purpose being exploitable (i.e. switching between semi-auto for high-pressure shells and pump-action for low-pressure ones). Unfortunately, however, the switching is performed by a simple touchpad button press on the forward hand's controller, with the pump not ever visibly moving to reflect the change in mode (always being shown in the correct position for pump-action fire, and never moving forward to switch to semi-auto); furthermore, the weapon's loading procedure is simplified, with the real weapon's requirement to hold down the bolt release in order to load shells into the magazine tube being omitted in-game.

Franchi SPAS-12 with stock folded and butt-hook removed - 12 gauge
Well, the shotgun's right here, but where is Sarah Connor?.
Well, she's not there.
Nope, not under there either.
She sure is good at hiding. Well, such is to be expected. After all, Sarah is quite a clever girl.

Tactical

Franchi SPAS-12 with stock removed – 12 gauge
The tactical version, with all the latest modern, advanced features. Stock and second barrel sold separately.
Loading in some shells, the loading gate being unusually cooperative considering the non-depressed bolt release.
Racking the charging handle, and sending a shell into the chamber.
Putting some extra shells into the side-mounted shell holder. Just in case.
Taking a look through the SPAS's distinctive ghost-ring sights...
...and blasting the target with buckshot.
Loading another shell, straight into the chamber...
...and then ejecting it, manually this time. Not shown: the shell actually being fired.
Well, it might be the T-800's gun, but that right there is his target's technique.
You might ask why someone would shove a magnifier on a shotgun. The answer? Because we can. And because we can, we have to.

"KWG1"

The "KWG1" is one of the available firearms in-game, added through Update #15. It is a fictional magazine-fed full-auto shotgun, rather reminiscent of the "Bolter" weapons from the Warhammer 40K universe. It is based on an image of what seems to be some sort of stage or cosplay prop, which was then adapted into a 3D model by artist Pavel Kutejnikov.

The prop that the "KWG1" was based upon, which seems to have an MP5 S-E-F trigger pack. Also note the shells in the magazine; the length of the brass, the plastic-like gloss across them, and the manner in which they are stacked (parallel to each other, which wouldn't be possible with actual shotgun shells due to their rims) all point towards this being a prop, rather than an actual live-firing shotgun.
After several hours of cutting, welding, and riveting, the work finally bears fruit.
Loading some "SWAG-12" high-explosive shells (an obvious play on the real-world FRAG-12 explosive shells) into one of the KWG1's distinctive windowed magazines. Said magazines seem to be suffering from a critical lack of springs.
Several shells later, it's time to load in the magazine...
...chamber a round...
...and purge the realm of heretics in the name of the Emperor.
After a change of place, and a change of time, the KWG1's well-worn finish shines in the light of the (earlier version of the) item spawner.
Loading in another magazine, this time filled with a suitably patriotic handload: "Freedomfetti" shells.
These do exactly what you'd expect. While it's sadly not something that can be expressed through the medium of an image, firing one of these shells produces a sound like that of a paper party horn.
Back in the indoor range, our discount Space Marine prepares to screw a suppressor onto his KWG1, which demonstrates one of H3's interesting gameplay-oriented features:
Universal suppressor compatibility. A suppressor can shrink or expand to fit any weapon, from the diminutive Beretta Jetfire to the colossal Barrett M107A1.

Mossberg 590A1

The Mossberg 590A1 is one of the four shotguns added in Update #15, and the second pump-action shotgun added to H3 on the whole.

Mossberg 590 with ghost ring sights, bayonet lug, and Speedfeed stock - 12 gauge
The 590A1 attempts to back away from the horror that is the KWG1; being an inanimate object, this proves somewhat futile.
Examining the right side of the still-shaken shotgun...
...and the left side, which shows off the rather straightforward receiver markings.
Opening up the action...
...chamberloading a "SWAG-12" HE shell...
...taking pseudo-aim...
...and firing, with suitably explosive results.
Ejecting the spent-but-apparently-not-actually-fired shell.
On a sidenote, the 590A1 in-game is modeled with a Speedfeed stock.
Said stock is actually fully-functional; here, the wielder has decided to drop in a flechette shell.
What's that old saying? "If you love something, let it go"?

MPS AA-12 CQB

Update #55 added the much-demanded MPS AA-12 shotgun, specifically the short-barreled "CQB" model.

MPS AA-12 CQB - 12 gauge
"Ladies and gentlemen, the moment you have all been waiting for..."
"...the AAAAH MY EYES!"
Loading in a magazine at an angle that, if nothing else, can at least be excused by temporary blindness.
Locking back the bolt.
Taking aim; the sights aren't terribly precise, but then again, it is a fully-automatic shotgun. "Precise" isn't a word that would be used to describe it.
Blasting a target with 8 shells' worth of buckshot.
Of course, if 8 shells isn't enough...
...then 20 shells should be.

MTs255

The MTs255 revolving shotgun was added to the game in the first Meatmas update. 2 variants are available - a standard full-length version, and a version with a sawn-off barrel and stock.

MTs255 - 12 gauge
Admiring the MTs255 in the indoor range.
Opening up the MTs...
...and loading in some shells.
Shutting the shotgun with a rather ill-advised flick of the wrist. Or rather, a flick of both wrists, considering the weapon's 2-handed nature.
Taking aim at a target through the MTs's rather simple notch-and-post sights.
Ejecting a set of spent shells from the shotgun. And with that, we say goodbye to MTs255 Senior...
...and hello to his lovely son MTs255 Junior.
Loading the cut-down shotgun with an interesting assortment of shells: from top to bottom, there's a buckshot shell, a Dragon's Breath shell, a "Triple Hit" shell, a slug shell, and a "SWAG-12" fragmenting shell.
Making the same mistake as with the full-length MTs, and snapping the cylinder back into place.
Firing; this is the result of the Dragon's Breath shell, which is rather underwhelming in broad daylight.

Remington 870 Express Tactical Magpul

Added in Update #52, the "Express 870", as it's known in-game, is a Remington 870 Express Tactical Magpul with tan furniture.

Remington 870 Express Tactical Magpul - 12 gauge
Inspecting the Remington 870 Express Tactical Magpul. Note the curious addition of the number 11 on the side of the receiver; this is most likely meant as some sort of armory/rack number.
The other side of the... y'know what, I'm not going to type out that ridiculously long set of words again. If you still don't understand what it is after the fourth time, then you just aren't going to.
Chambering a Dragon's Breath shell. While shotguns are generally regarded as being good for room-clearing, it's usually understood that doing so requires actually firing the shotgun first.
The Sosigs having realized this and returned, one finds the player character engaging in the rather unorthodox practice of using a shotgun "gangsta-style".
Having come to their senses, said player character is soon merrily blasting the Sosigs with the now-correctly-oriented shotgun. The Dragon's Breath round is rather interesting: it is filled with pieces of magnesium, which catch fire as they fly through the air, and start fires where they land, as seen here. Due to the round's low pressure and high cost, coupled with international regulations on the use of incendiary munitions on human beings (and the risk of setting things on fire by accident), these incendiary shells aren't used in any sort of martial capacity, and are largely a civilian novelty.
Aiming the shotgun at a couple of Molotov cocktails bottles of Frank's Fantastic Festively Fragrant And Fiercely Flavorful Fancy Fire Fluid. These are an Update #59 addition, as is this scene (the Proving Grounds), the Sosig, the beginnings of a fire system (which renders the Dragon's Breath rounds far more useful), and the rear sight on this shotgun and the TAC-14 DM below (both previously having a smooth, blank receiver).
Firing (heh), which has predictable consequences.
Ejecting the freshly-fired shell. While not seen here, the player character's expression of giddy satisfaction is somewhat dimmed by their newfound lack of eyebrows.

Remington 870 Field Gun

The Meatmas Update of 2016 added a Remington 870 Field Gun with a cut-down barrel. Update #46 added two additional variants, one with a sawn-off stock and one with a full-length barrel; it also made the latter one of the available weapons for SWBs.

Remington 870 Field Gun with shortened barrel - 12 gauge
Examining the truncated 870.
While not the sawn-off Remington of legend, it is still fairly cool.
Especially considering the presence of a stock.
Loading the 870; it can hold 4 shells in the tube, plus one in the chamber.
Chambering a shell.
Aiming; this being a sawn-off shotgun, there aren't any sights to render this activity worthwhile.
Blasting the target to smithereens. Well, not really, but it's more fun to think so.
Ejecting a spent shell.
Ditto, but this time in a familiarly eye-damaging manner.
Reloading the now-empty shotgun, straight through the ejection port this time.
Sawn-off Remington 870 - 12 gauge
A Weinerbot in a rather awkward standoff with the player. Note that its 870's pump handle is pulled to the rear; Weinerbots' weapons actually have moving parts. It's almost like you're actually supposed to get close to them or something...
Examining the left side of the enemies' low-poly 870 (in "Sosigun" form)...
...and the right side of a different one.
Firing the cut-off 870.
What follows is a pumping sequence that would seem a lot more normal were it not for the fact that this weapon is only being held with one hand; presumably in order to keep its behaviors simple enough to maintain the Sosiguns' low performance costs, the pump simply cycles itself automatically upon firing.
*record scratch*
*freeze frame*
"Yup, that's me. You're probably wondering how I wound up in this situation."
The updated, rubberized 870 Sosigun. Not much has changed, apart from the addition of a couple of pins and some very widely-spaced pump handle serrations.
Taking a look at the even shorter Remington...
Remington 870 Field Gun (full-length) - 12 gauge
...and the l o n g b o i .

Remington 870 TAC-14 DM

The later detachable-magazine variant of the Remington 870, the 870 DM, was added in Update #52. It is in the "TAC-14" configuration, a variant with a 14" barrel and a Shockwave Industries Raptor grip, which is meant to make it evade NFA regulations regarding short-barreled shotguns by way of legally not being classified as anything other than a "firearm". The one in-game is also presumably either modified or broken, seeing as it is capable of slam-fire, unlike a normal 870.

Remington 870 TAC-14 DM - 12 gauge
The new kid on the block.
A closer look at the 870, giving a good look at the magazine well that takes the place of a normal 870's loading port.
The other side, which gives a view of the bolt and ejection port.
Loading a magazine into the 870 DM.
Ejecting a fired shell.
Taking advantage of the 870's seemingly broken trigger group, and letting loose with a barrage of 12 gauge shells.

Remington Model 11

The Remington Model 11 was added in Update #52; its first introduction was in the Valentine's Day alpha build.

Remington Model 11 - 12 gauge
The left side of the Model 11, which shows off the engravings (and the lack of a magazine cutoff, distinguishing it from the Browning Auto-5 upon which the Model 11 is based)...
...and the right side, which shows off some of the working bits.
Locking the bolt to the rear.
Chamberloading the Model 11.
Loading the other 4 shells into the magazine tube.
Aiming the shotgun, showing off its simple bead sight.
Blasting the paper target with a 12 gauge shell.

Remington Model 1882

Update #52 added a Remington Model 1882 double-barreled shotgun.

Remington Model 1889 - 12 gauge. Similar to the Model 1882.
Modern indoor range, meet classic rabbit-ear shotgun.
Taking a look at the stock, which has a brass badge attached to the side.
Opening the Model 1882.
Loading in some shells.
Cocking the left hammer. The right was soon to follow.
Aiming the 1882. There's nothing but a simple bead sight available for this purpose.
2 shots later, and it's time to eject some shells.

Saiga 12

A Saiga 12 with a side-folding stock is one of the available firearms in-game, added through Update #40. It can use either factory 5-round magazines, aftermarket 12-round box magazines, or aftermarket 20-round drums.

Saiga-12K - 12 gauge
A beautiful piece of Russian engineering.
The other side. Note that the safety is on; this is standard for weapons in H3 when they are first spawned.
Fiddling with the folding stock, while trying to ignore the ever-invasive options panel.
Loading in a 5-round magazine.
Chambering a shell.
Firing the Saiga.
Loading in a 12-round magazine...
...before performing a rather strange tactical reload.
Of course, if 12 rounds isn't enough for you...
Preparing to affix a somewhat undersized SilencerCo Osprey suppressor.
A suppressor which, of course, re-scales itself to match the Saiga's barrel, as seen in this demonstration of a complete and utter failure to understand the concept of a "target".

Sawn-off Double Barreled Shotgun

There are 4 main varieties of Sawed-off Double Barrel Shotgun in-game. The first (and also one of the first weapons added to the game, back when the game was just Anton Hand's experiment grounds and not even named H3VR yet) was the so-called "Cartoon 8 Gauge", which sounds downright painful, the second is a more reasonable 12-gauge version (seen below), and the 3rd is the same as the second, except sawn down to Killing Them Softly-level absurdity (albeit unlike that movie's shotgun, this one also has the grip sawn down even further than the standard version), which, predictably, makes the spread somewhere between hilarious and pitiful. The fourth, added with Update #52, is an 1864 Wells Fargo stagecoach shotgun with external hammers and shell loops on the forend.

Wurstworld's Weinerbots also make use of sawn-off shotguns, alongside their generic revolvers and lever-action rifles.

Remington Spartan Sawed Off shotgun - 12 gauge
While shooting at the range, the urge to rant to "primitive screw heads" is differed by the lack of other range patrons.
Opening up the shotgun.
Loading in some shells.
Aiming the shotgun, using its complete lack of sights...
...before bringing the paper range target to its inevitable Doom.
Two shots fired, 2 shells ejected.

Ultra-short sawed-off

Aww, isn't it adorable?
A close look at the ultra-short version's muzzle.
Loading in some #4 Buckshot shells...
...which are precisely flush with the ends of the barrels.
The spread pattern of the shotgun. The radius of its spread is approximately half of the user's distance from the target.
Seeing as the shells are perfectly flush with the muzzle when unfired, when they're fired, the opened-up crimps of the shells actually extend past the barrels.
Ejecting the fired shells from one of the shotguns.

Cartoon 8 Gauge

The "Cartoon 8 Gauge", in all of its glory.
Loading some utterly massive shells into the weapon's breech...
...before annihilating everything in front of the weapon, along with the user's wrist.
Given the amount of smoke this weapon produces, it wouldn't be a stretch to say its shells are loaded with black powder, rather than smokeless. This could also go some way to explaining how the weapon stays in the user's hand upon firing.
Removing the spent shells from the shotgun, vowing never to do that again.

1864 Wells Fargo

Sawn-off Rossi Overland SBS Shotgun - 12 gauge. Similar to the weapon in-game.
Admiring the 1864 Wells.
Loading some shells into the loops on the forend. Just in case.
Opening up the shotgun.
Loading in a pair of shells.
A close-up of the 1864's trigger group, showing off some of the wear and scratching. As to be expected for a firearm of this vintage.
Cocking the left hammer...
...and the right one...
...before blowing away the paper target charging bandit, vowing to defend this range booth stagecoach to the very last.
Having dealt with the would-be stagecoach robber, the guard ejects the spent shells from his shotgun.

Serbu Super Shorty

A Remington 870-based Serbu Super Shorty is one of the weapons added in the first Meatmas update. 2 variants are available: a normal, clean version, and a "tacticool" version, complete with a door-breaching muzzle brake, a rail mount, and a set of spare shell holders that hold more shells than the gun itself does.

Serbu Super Shorty (Remington 870-based) - 12 gauge
A pair of Super Shorties lying on a table.
Taking a look at the clean, normal version...
...and the tacticool version.
Deciding that, since this version has a higher number written on the side, it obviously must be better, our handless friend loads in some shells. And by "some", we mean 2.
Plus an extra one, provided that there's one in the chamber.
Placing some shells in the shell holders. What's that old expression again? "A ten-gallon hat on a one-quart head"?
Taking aim...
...firing a shell...
...and working the action...
...before remembering to actually make use of the top-mounted rail.
Ah, much better!
Celebrating this new development in actually-having-a-chance-of-hitting-your-target technology by loading a shell directly into the chamber.
After a long day of shooting, our friend decides to set the shotguns down, and go home to massage his aching nonexistent wrists.

Winchester Model 1887

The Model 1887 was added to H3 with the Wurstworld update, and comes in both full length and sawn-off forms. And yes, it can be spin-cocked a la Terminator 2. (In fact, one of Wurstworld's rewards is a T2-themed sawn-off 1887, complete with a darker finish, extended lever loop, and cut-back trigger guard.)

Winchester 1887 shotgun - 12 gauge
Taking in the beauty of the Winchester M1887, whilst trying to ignore the work-in-progress nature of the surrounding environment.
A close look at the Winchester. Note the interesting addition of a grasping groove in the forearm, rather like some bolt-action rifles (such as the Mark 1 version of the M1903 Springfield).
Opening the 1887's action...
...which gives a good look at the weapon's breech and magazine tube.
Loading in a handful of "Triple Hit" shells; these contain 3 miniature slugs, stacked end-to-end. The Winchester in-game correctly holds 5 rounds in the tube and a sixth in the chamber.
Taking aim at a decanter...
...and firing. Note the impressive ricochets; the slugs in the "Triple Hit" shells are apparently coded as being made of tempered steel, which makes them extremely prone to bouncing off of hard objects.
A close-up of the 1887 cycling. The weapon actually correctly shows spent shells being pulled from the chamber before being ejected, and fresh ones being pushed in; the latter is taking place here.
Sawn-off Winchester Model 1887 (Norinco Replica) - 12 gauge
The shortened variant. Note that, curiously, this variant lacks the grasping groove of the standard version.
Opening the action.
Loading in some shells.
Aiming at a bottle...
...before blowing it to pieces. Once again, the ricochet-prone nature of the "Triple Hit" shells makes itself apparent.
Flip-cocking the 1887. This can be done either forwards or backwards, completely regardless of the standard, non-extended lever loop that would be liable to break the user's fingers were they to attempt to do such a thing. But this is a game with "Hot Dog" in the name, so we'll let it slide.
Another angle, showing a new shell being chambered.

Winchester Model 1897

Update #52's impressive list of new firearms includes the Winchester Model 1897, in its famous military "Trench Gun" configuration. It is correctly capable of slam-fire, and holds an appropriate 5 rounds in the tube plus one in the chamber.

Winchester Model 1897 "Trench Gun" - 12 gauge
Taking in the beauty of a century-old shotgun.
The other side, showing off the ejection port.
As above, but with the action open. Note the bolt protruding from the rear of the receiver, and the shell lifter coming out of the bottom; both of these are correct for the weapon.
Loading a 12 gauge buckshot round into the 1897's chamber...
...before putting another 5 in the tube magazine.
Practicing some trench-sweeping, and firing all 6 shots without letting go of the trigger.

Assault Rifles

AK-101

An AK-101 was added in the 2016 Meatmas update. Update #40 replaced the model, and made its side-mounted dovetail rail functional, allowing for the use of Soviet-type optics (or Western ones, if an adaptor is installed).

AK-101 - 5.56x45mm NATO
"If you say in the first chapter that there is a rifle hanging on the wall, in the second or third chapter it absolutely must go off."
Giving the asynchronous audience at various homes a nice look at the AK-101.
Of course, when showcasing an AK, always make sure the other side of the rifle actually exists. Same goes for buying one. Damned scammers...
Loading in a 30-round magazine full of capitalist propaganda 5.56x45mm NATO.
Racking the charging handle.
Looking through the 101's irons...
...and letting some rounds fly.
Out with the old, and in with the new.
Well, newer, anyway.
As mentioned, the newer 101's dovetail rail allows for the mounting of various Combloc optics, such as this PK-01VS red-dot sight.
Said sight has an interesting blue-tinted lens. Also note the newer model's somewhat clearer-looking iron sights.
If you're in the mood for something with a bit more magnification, the iconic PSO-1 4x scope is always a good choice.
Looking through the scope reveals that H3VR is one of a select few games that understands what a PSO-1 reticle actually looks like.
It also shows something about the PSO-1 that even fewer pieces of media depict:
The small switch on the side.
Of course, the switch isn't just there for show; it's used to turn on (or off) the PSO-1's integrated reticle illumination light, as seen in this appalling display of poor range etiquette.

AKM

An AKM is one of the available firearms in-game. Added in Update #13 (the 2016 4th of July update), it has an interesting list of updates under its belt; Update #40 replaced the model entirely, with one that lacked the prior model's permanently-attached side-bracket rail adaptor, the 10th alpha of Update #52 added the AKM to the arsenals of SWBs, and Update #58 added a "Tactical" model fitted with a variety of aftermarket modifications; among them are a full set of Magpul MOE furniture, a railed receiver cover, an aftermarket rear sight, an aftermarket selector lever, and an aftermarket muzzle brake.

AKM - 7.62x39mm
The older AKM, resting peacefully on a table.
It's then rudely and suddenly awakened, so that the viewers at home can get a better look at it.
I hope that you're happy.
Loading a magazine into the AKM.
Taking advantage of the rail mount, and attaching a...
"NYET! RIFLE IS FINE!"
The other side of the new and improved AKM. "New" in the sense that it's a new model, "improved" because it's an AKM, not an original AK.
Loading in a magazine...
...before completely failing to pull the charging handle.
This failure comes as a result of one of the AK series' distinctive features: the selector lever, when set to safe, also serves as a dustcover, preventing debris from entering the charging handle slot. This, of course, has the side effect of preventing the charging handle from entering the charging handle slot.
Another thing to note about the AK series is the arrangement of the selector's positions; rather than the "Safe-Semi-Auto" model common on most select-fire weapons, AKs generally have a "Safe-Auto-Semi" setup, which means that disengaging an AK's safety sends the user straight into full-auto.
Right, now that that's been sorted, it's time to get back to business.
Taking a look through the AKM's sights...
...and blazing away in full-auto.
Yet another attribute of the AK series is the so-called "tactical reload", made possible by the combination of a paddle magazine release and a shallow, rock-in magazine well; the routine consists of 3 steps: first, knock the old magazine out with a new one...
...second, rock in the new magazine...
...and third, pull the charging handle. There are different ways to do this; the underhand technique seen here is quite popular in the West, whereas the East generally prefers to run the entire process with only the right hand.
Loading the AKM with a 75-round RPK drum...
...and merrily unloading into the walls, floor, and ceiling.
Speaking of merry, here's a shot from the "How the Gronch Monetized Meatmas" trailer for Update #49, featuring the titular misspelled villain "holding" an AKM, whilst telling players how to spend hours upon hours grinding to obtain loot-crates and in-game currencies in order to access EAPA (Earliest Access Pride & Accomplishment) boxes. Note that, curiously, the Gronch's rifle seems to be a non-railed version of the older model, despite that model having been removed from the game 9 updates prior.
Reaching for a Sosig's AKM...
...snatching it...
...and unloading it into its former owner, sending out a shower of mustard and meat chunks in the process.
Examining the stubby AKM. Note that it uses early-pattern "slab-side" magazines, presumably in order to maintain a low poly-count.
A group of Sosigs investigating the source of a gunshot (said source being the person taking the picture), the one in the middle giving a good view of the right side of its AKM; note the charging handle and the corresponding slot in the receiver.
"Aiming" the low-poly rifle; the fact that both the front and rear sights are large, solid blocks doesn't exactly help in this regard.
The updated model of the Sosigs' AKM. Not a whole lot has changed here, but the weapon notably does have Bakelite-styled magazines instead of the prior slab-sides, along with an AK-74-esque stock divot.
Century Arms C39 V2 with Magpul MOE furniture - 7.62x39mm. Image provided to show the Magpul accessories; the gun in-game is not a C39.
"CYKA! I SAID RIFLE IS FINE! WHAT IN GOD'S NAME EVEN IS THIS MERZOST?!"
Even the letterboxing seems to agree with this sentiment, doing its best to shield the viewers' eyes from the heresy before them.
Being a Magpul-furnished rifle, it only makes sense that it comes with (interchangeable) 30-round Magpul PMAGs.
Pulling the extended charging handle. Note the aftermarket selector lever; this includes a cutout in the top, which is used to lock the handle to the rear.
A good shot of the rifle's stock.
Aiming through the non-standard rear sight...
...and firing.
Tactical rifle, tactical reload.
And a rather - *ahem* - tactical firing stance.

AKS-74U

The AKS-74U is one of the available firearms in-game, having been added in Update #18. Update #55 added a "Tactical" version with various aftermarket accessories.

AKS-74U (also referred to as the "AKSU" or 'Krinkov') - 5.45x39mm
Taking a look at a fresh, new AKS-74U, hot off the presses.
The other side, which shows that, as is standard for guns in H3, the selector starts out set to "safe".
Taking a look at a magazine, which shows that the rounds have some rather... interesting deformation.
Loading in the magazine, unconcerned with the headspacing issues that such deformed ammunition can bring with it.
Pulling back the charging handle (after disengaging the safety, of course).
Taking aim at the target...
...and firing. A spent case can just be seen coming out of the ejection port.
Folding the stock, after deciding that the AKS-74U in its prior state was too stable, too controllable, and all-around too useful.
Ahh, much better!
AKS-74U with railed handguard - 5.45x39mm
The "Tactical" model, in all of its polymer-festooned glory. Note how it seems to have the stock from an 100-series AK rifle, such as the AK-74M.
Loading in an interestingly marbled polymer magazine.
Pulling back the aftermarket rounded charging handle.
Drawing a bead...
...and slinging some lead. Those two words don't rhyme, because English is a very sensible, well thought-out language.

Colt M4A1

The M4A1 is one of the available firearms in-game, and one of the first to be added; it predates even the game's actual name. This model was a publicly-available asset made by weapon artist Nightfrontier, who had collaborated with game lead Anton Hand on disassembling it into the game's systems.

Due to game issues relating to the original weapon model, Update #48 revamped the weapon model, replacing it with a new one that lacks the previous model's folding foregrip, and has a railed handguard, a Crane stock, an extended charging handle tab, and an aftermarket folding BUIS. The update also included a "Left Hook" variant, which is completely mirrored, and meant for left-handed users.

Colt M4A1 - 5.56x45mm NATO
Well, well, well, what have we here?
Loading a 30-round magazine into the M4A1.
Flipping the rifle over...
...and pulling the charging handle.
Next up on the checklist: the fire selector.
Setting it to semi-auto...
...and to rock 'n roll. Note how the fire selector isn't quite in either position; H3's fire selectors used to be animated so as to move gradually, but this was later removed in favor of the current instantaneous-switching system.
Blasting away at nothing in particular; the muzzle flash is yet another thing that has long since changed (with rumors of a possible further change in the future, to accommodate attachments such as muzzle brakes and compensators).
Dumping out the now-empty magazine.
One new magazine later, one step to go:
Tapping the bolt release. One feature that (fortunately) hasn't disappeared is the movable nature of the bolt release paddle; it correctly pops up when the bolt is locked back, and lays flat when the bolt is in battery (compare with the image above).
Should one fail to properly chamber the rifle (i.e. manually riding the charging handle forward into battery instead of letting it snap back under spring tension), the bolt winds up in this position.
Luckily, it's nothing that a quick tap of the forward assist can't fix. This is yet another feature that has since been removed, due to it being somewhat buggy and inconsistent, not to mention difficult for new players to understand.
Grabbing the rifle's forend causes (or rather, caused) the foregrip to somewhat slowly unfold, much like the fire selector. Seems like something's missing here...
Oh. Right. That's... kinda important.
Aiming through the M4A1's now-complete irons gives a good look at the curiously green-painted front post. It's not a standard feature, but hey, it makes the post easier to see, so why not?
The handle-mounted sight also comes came with a few selectable options, indicated by small white arrows whenever a controller is was close by. The top arrow allowsed the player to swap out the standard aperture sight with...
...whatever this is was...
...while the side arrow allows (y'know what, just read all the verbs in the past tense, 'cause I'm too lazy to keep track of them all myself) for the adjustment of the rear sight's elevation, between this...
...and this, with 3 other positions in-between.
If that's not your style, you can always tack on a scope...
...the lens covers helpfully popping open when you do so.
Grabbing the foregrip...
...and, a fair while later, watching it settle into its fully-unfolded position.
Aiming; this scope is actually modeled after a red-dot magnifier, but was implemented as a scope at the time due to a lack of a proper scope model. Yet another problem that has long since been fixed.
The shiny new "Left Hook" version, fresh out of Update #48. Brings back good memories...
The right side of the Left Hook, showing the features that the left side is supposed to have.
Fiddling with the foldable BUIS, which takes the place of the older model's carrying handle.
It still has the original front sight/gas block, though.
Playing around with the stock. Upon the weapon's release, this possessed a notable visual bug wherein the entire buffer tube moved in and out of the receiver with the stock; the following update fixed this.
A beautiful pair of fraternal twins.
Loading a magazine into the standard M4A1. This magazine, fitted with a Magpul handling loop, is another Update #48 addition.
A nice touch of the newer M4A1 is the dustcover...
...which pops open when the bolt first comes back...
...and stays there when it returns to battery (though it can be manually closed at the player's discretion). Also note the serrations on the bolt; these serve as points for the forward assist to push on.
Being the same gun, the fire selector still has the same 3 settings: safe...
...semi...
...and full-auto.
Aiming, which shows off both the sights and the aftermarket extended charging handle tab.
Firing the M4A1.
Making sure the other rifle doesn't feel "left" out, and loading in a magazine.
Another detail; when the charging handle is pulled...
...the aforementioned aftermarket charging handle tab pops out.
Firing the Left Hook. You looked to the wrong side of the picture for spent casings, didn't you?

"M4A1 Shorty"

Added in Update #49, the "M4A1 Shorty" is, as the name implies, a variant of the M4A1 with a shorter barrel, gas system, and handguard. It doesn't specifically match any one model in particular; the most appropriate way to describe it would be a commercial "pistol" upper receiver attached to a standard M4A1 lower.

Mk. 18 Mod 0 - 5.56x45mm NATO
Somewhere between this...
Olympic Arms K23B Tactical w/foregrip - 5.56x45mm NATO
...and this.
A close-up shot of the Shorty's forend; it's pretty much just the standard handguard, but with 2 vents instead of 3.
Performing a quick brass check, while simultaneously showing that the rest of the model is more or less identical to the standard M4A1.
Sighting up a Weinerbot with the Aimpoint red-dot sight attached to the carbine.
Performing a quick reload in the middle of a gunfight. Though, granted, considering its size, pretty much anything that happens in the Mini Arena is "in the middle of a gunfight".
While sudden, close-up encounters such as this aren't terribly god for the health of the player's heart, they are good for showing off the Shorty's rather impressive muzzle blast. As to be expected from a rifle with a <10" (<25.4 cm) barrel.
Attempting to perform another brass check, this time with just a little bit too much enthusiasm.

Colt Model 607

The final weapon made available to the SWBs in Update #46 was most likely intended as a cartoonish M16A1, with the resultant weapon resembling a Colt Model 607.

M16A1 with 20-round magazine - 5.56x45mm NATO
Colt Model 607 with 20-round magazine - 5.56x45mm NATO
A now-headless bot dropping to the floor, somehow still keeping a grip on its Model 607; this is made doubly strange by the fact that they don't even have hands to grip their guns with in the first place (a fact which, according to one of their voice lines, they are actually aware of).
Another bot "meating" a similar end. Fun fact: you can't tell for sure if this gun is facing towards or away from the camera. And now you can never unsee that.
To help take your mind off of your newfound hatred of me, here's a picture of a camouflaged Sosig with a 607 slung over its... well, you can't call it a shoulder, because they don't have arms, so... y'know what, let's just say that the Sosig's carrying it. That seems like a solid plan.
Grabbing the Sosig's 607...
...before wasting all of its ammo on the floor.
Examining the now-empty rifle.
A far more heavily-armored Sosig helpfully showing off the other side of its rifle. While it's presumably just a result of the rifle's deliberately low-poly modeling (especially since it's indexed in the spawning menu as "M16"), the shortened stock, exposed-barrel-to-handguard ratio, and slickside upper receiver (complete with modeled ejection port) help further peg it as a Model 607.
Blasting away an enemy, with the rebuilt tracer effects creating a spectacular lightshow; note that the 607 lacks a rear sight.
The updated model of the 607 brings with it the rather curious choice of a handguard with grasping serrations rather like those of an M16A2; it also has space in the lower receiver for a magazine release, but not the actual magazine release itself.
A dropped 607 fitted with a suppressor, as used by some of the Pacification Squad enemies.
The laser on this particular firearm seems to spontaneously emanate from either the front sight the gas block.

CZ SA vz. 58P

The final, full release of Update #59 brought along a series of CZ SA vz. 58 variants, the first of which is a standard, full-stocked vz. 58P ("Pěchotní", Czech for "infantry").

CZ SA vz. 58P - 7.62x39mm
Behold, a rifle.
And no, it's not an AK. Hlupák.
Not even the magazine is from an AK. Banish the thought of AKs from your mind entirely, for this has nothing to do with them.
Pulling back the charging handle, which gives an excellent view of the rounds in the magazine, courtesy of the vz. 58's distinctive open-topped receiver.
The fire selector is this lever on the side; here it is on semi-auto...
...and here it is on "30".
Taking a look at the vz. 58's iron sights: a simple rear tangent notch and hooded front post, both mounted on the barrel. Serviceable, if a bit dated.
Firing; the combination of straight-upwards ejection and a low ceiling make casings traveling in opposite directions a rather frequent sight in the indoor range.
Another interesting feature of the vz. 58 is its ability to accept stripper clips, as seen here; these clips hold 10 rounds apiece.

CZ SA vz. 58V

To compliment the full-stocked vz. 58P, Update #59 also added a CZ SA vz. 58V, the folding-stocked paratrooper model (the "V" standing for "Výsadkový", Czech for "airborne"). An additional variant with an aftermarket muzzle device, railed handguard, synthetic pistol grip, receiver-mounted scope rail, extended magazine release, and aftermarket ambidextrous bolt was also added, known as the "Custom" variant.

CZ SA vz. 58V - 7.62x39mm
To spice things up a bit, instead of the perpendicularly-angled detail shots you're used to by now, here's an obliquely-angled shot!
"Haha! With these new shots, they'll never even realize that they're just looking at the exact same gun with a different stock on it! It's BRILLIANT! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

...this thing isn't on, is it?
"
*Ahem*
"Right, moving on..." Folding the vz. 58V's stock...
...which sits nice and flush on the side of the receiver.
Loading in a magazine. Fortunately, the stock was kind enough to recognize that, seeing as this is an indoor shooting range and not a plane, it should unfold itself to help facilitate more accurate shooting. That, or the shot of it being unfolded just wound up on the cutting room floor. One of the two.
Pulling back the charging handle.
Doing the right thing, and letting it go. As nice as it may seem to keep it sheltered and safe at home, a charging handle belongs in the wild.
Aiming...
...and firing. Contrary to what these images might suggest, these are not mutually exclusive actions.

Custom

Loading up the Custom variant.
Examining the rifle reveals a charging handle here...
...and a charging handle there! Char-ging-han-dles-ev-ry-where!
Aiming the tacticool vz. 58; the aftermarket scope rail has a groove down the middle, allowing for a (slightly cramped) view of the irons.
Firing; apparently, one of the spent casings doesn't quite get the idea of a "personal bubble".
This happens sometimes too.
One magazine later, the vz. 58 locks open.
Oh, and the stock folds. Just thought that you should know.

CZ SA vz. 58 Compact

Along with the full-length variants, Update #59 brought along a CZ SA vz. 58 Compact. The vz. 58 Compact in-game lacks its standard side-folding stock; instead, it is compatible with the game's selection of pistol stocks.

CZ SA vz. 58 Compact - 7.62x39mm
D'awww....
The other side of the adorably tiny carbine.
Loading the vz. 58 Compact, which makes the already cartoonishly-proportioned weapon look even more preposterous.
Racking the charging handle.
Aiming; the fact that the rear sight is still barrel-mounted gives the Compact a sight radius that'd be on the shorter end for a handgun, let alone an assault rifle.
Firing the carbine, producing appropriately massive amounts of sound and muzzle flash. Note the small gray dot underneath the rear sight; this is the vz. 58 series's distinctive short-stroke gas piston.
Oh, and for anyone who wants to try firing this thing one-handed, here's some advice:
Don't.
Just don't.

FAMAS F1

The FAMAS F1 was the first weapon in the "Bullpup Trifecta" that was added in the first Meatmas update, alongside the L85A2 and the AUG A3.

FAMAS F1 - 5.56x45mm
Loading a magazine into the FAMAS. Fortunately, H3 understands that the F1 uses its own proprietary magazines, as opposed to the many games that simply shove a STANAG into the magazine well and hope for the best.
Pulling back the charging handle.
Admiring the FAMAS, whilst trying to resist the urge to make a "rich and FAMAS" joke (knowing full well that that's not how it's pronounced).
The FAMAS's fire selector is of note: the switch in the trigger guard toggles between safe...
...semi-auto...
...and a mode that can be either full-auto or 3-round burst...
...depending on the position of this switch on the stock. Initially, this switch couldn't be used, with the 3rd selector position being exclusively set to burst; a later patch changed this.
Popping open the FAMAS's integral bipod.
A FAMAS mounted on a somewhat inconveniently low table.
The F1's irons, which have 3 settings: "Aim Large, Miss Large"...
..."Aim Small, Miss Small"...
...and "Aim Medium, Miss Medium".
The post-Update #52 version of the FAMAS, which has a pair of rail segments - one on the bottom of the handguard, and one on top of the carrying handle.

Heckler & Koch G36

The Heckler & Koch G36 is one of the available firearms in-game. It, along with its shorter sibling, were added in Update #23.

Heckler & Koch G36 with ZF 3x4° dual optical sight - 5.56x45mm
Always have to enjoy a well-modeled full size G36.
Loading in a 100-round dual drum magazine.
Pulling back the G36's charging handle. Note the bipod; H3 correctly depicts the G36 with a functional integrated bipod, which, when combined with the ability to use 100-round magazines, makes for a handy light support weapon.
Looking through the top red-dot portion of the ZF 3x4° dual-mode optic, another rarity in video games.
The bottom portion of the ZF optic, which consists of a 3x magnified scope.
Choosing the former of the two options, and opening fire with the G36. When it's deployed on its bipod, the G36 is precise enough that one can quite literally sign their initials on the indoor range's target in full-auto, if they so desire.

Heckler & Koch G36C

The Heckler & Koch G36C is one of the available firearms in-game; like the full-length variant, it was added in Update #23.

Heckler & Koch G36C - 5.56x45mm
Taking a look at the G36C.
Loading in a standard 30-round magazine; these are normally translucent in reality, but they're opaque black in-game.
Pulling the charging handle. As with the standard G36 above, the end of the charging handle correctly folds out to whichever side it's grabbed from, though it isn't very visible here due to the angle at which the rifle is held.
Checking some range results, now-readied G36C in tow.
Aiming through the (rather wide) sights; a later update made the flip-up rear aperture usable as well.
Sending a burst of 5.56mm rounds flying at the target.
Et tu, Brute?

IMBEL IA2

The IMBEL IA2 5.56mm CQC is one of the available firearms in-game; it was added in the 1st Meatmas Update.

IMBEL IA2 5.56mm CQC w/ bayonet - 5.56x45mm
Loading a 30-round STANAG magazine into the IA2.
Sometimes, one must observe their Brazilian rifles due to their overall rarity in media.
The IMBEL's other side, which shows off the brass deflector.
Rare-rifle-observation finished, the IA2's charging handle is pulled.
Aiming through the larger of the rifle's 2 rear aperture sight options...
...and the smaller one.
Firing the IA2, although perspective would have you believe that the rear sight has spontaneously spat out a spent casing.
Folding the stock, just for the fun of it.

FN SCAR-L

The FN SCAR-L is one of the available firearms in-game. It, along with its heavier-caliber sibling, were added in Update #32.

Third Generation FN SCAR-L - 5.56x45mm NATO
Admiring the SCAR-L. Curiously, the upper and lower receivers are in slightly different colors.
Extending the SCAR's collapsible stock. Of note is that this, like many stock-related functions in H3, served no practical purpose until much later on, when the recoil system was modified to accommodate them.
Loading a 30-round STANAG magazine into the rifle.
Chambering a 5.56mm round.
Looking through the first of the SCAR's 2 optional rear sight apertures...
...and the second, smaller one.
If neither are particularly to your liking, you can always fold them down and attach a sight, such as this Aimpoint red-dot. Note the label on the scope; for copyright reasons, "Aimpoint" has been changed to "Gamepoint".
Flipping the rifle's selector from safe to semi-auto. Note the receiver's markings; in contrast with the sight's obfuscated manufacturer's markings, the rifle itself has near-proper "FN HERSTAL BELGIUM" trademarks, save for the odd rewriting of "HERSTAL" as "HöRSTAL". The markings below that read "MK 16 MOD 0", "Cal 5.56x45 MM", and a serial number of "H3VR2317", an obvious reference to the game itself.
Aiming through the red-dot sight...
...and firing.
30 rounds later, and it's time to retire the old magazine. Along with the sight, apparently.
Of course, if you're a true tactical operator, then it's not really an issue.

L85A2

The L85A2 is the 2nd part of the first Meatmas update's "Bullpup Trifecta", alongside the FAMAS F1 and AUG A3. Initially, there were 2 variants available - one with iron sights, and one with a SUSAT scope - but Update #52 removed the latter version, replacing it with an attachable version of the SUSAT.

L85A2 - 5.56x45mm NATO
A nice shot of an iron-sighted L85A2.
Loading in a 30-round STANAG magazine.
Pulling the charging handle, while earning a disapproving glare from the ghost of an English military trainer that watches us all from the heavens; the UK military's official recommended method is to pull the charging handle with the left hand, so as to be able to see the ejection port without removing the rifle from the user's shoulder.
Manipulating the L85A2's interesting (if not terribly ergonomic) set of controls; to set the weapon to full-auto...
...one must first disengage the crossbolt safety located above the trigger...
...then reach back and flip the stock-mounted selector switch. While this could initially be used like any other selector in-game, it was later updated to reflect the 2-part nature of the fire controls.
Taking a look at the L85's irons...
L85A2 with SUSAT scope - 5.56x45mm NATO
...not that anyone actually uses them, anyways.
A broader look at the scoped L85, which gives a clearer view of the excised front iron sight. While this would be an inaccuracy for many weapons, on the L85A2, it's just standard practice (as the reference image displays).
The SUSAT's distinctive single-post reticle.

M16A1

The M16A1 is one of the available firearms in-game, having been added through the first Meatmas update. Update #51 brought along 2 unique scopes for the weapon: a 6-24x variable-magnification scope, and a fixed-magnification 3x20 scope.

M16A1 with 20-round magazine - 5.56x45mm
While he isn't a GI in 'Nam, our invisible range buddy ponders why 2+2 is on his mind.
The right side of the rifle, which shows off the serrations on the bolt; these are meant to interface with the forward assist (the button behind the bolt), so that it can be forced into battery, should you find your rifle in a (little hometown) jam.
Loading in a 20-round magazine. While other 5.56mm STANAGs can be used in as well, they just aren't the same as the classic straight 20-rounder.
Pulling back the M16A1's charging handle.
Looking through the sights...
...and showing Paper Charlie up ahead that Private Invisible Hands was born to kill.
Attaching a 3x20 scope...
...which interfaces with a hole in the top of the carrying handle.
Aiming through the 3x20 scope. No, this scope isn't attached upside-down; that's what its reticle is supposed to look like, for whatever reason.
Finding this reticle easy to lose among the trees, Pvt. Hands decides to switch it out for a different optic.
Confident that the scope will stay in place, he decides to proceed.
He then adjusts the scope's magnification, while wondering where the small floating box is coming from. Probably the drugs.
Aiming with the 6-24x scope reveals a much clearer duplex crosshair reticle, perfect for fighting someone else's war.

Mk 18 Mod 1

Update #10 added a Mk 18 Mod 1, fitted with a non-standard railed handguard with rail covers, an aftermarket pistol grip, a Crane stock, and a Magpul AFG, all (save for the handguard) in tan; the latter was removed and turned into an attachment in Update #52's 3rd alpha build.

Mk 18 Mod 1 with Crane stock, vertical foregrip, and folding sights - 5.56x45mm NATO
A tactical operator observes his Mk. 18 before preparing for some high-intensity training. He's so tactical that sights aren't necessary.
The rifle's other side, which gives a good view of the aftermarket handguard's distinctive vent holes.
A look at the fire selector, which has 3 positions: safe...
...semi...
...and, interestingly enough, 3-round burst. While Mk 18s are normally fitted with safe-semi-auto trigger groups, they are often modified in various ways; furthermore, since the entire CQBR program (Close Quarters Battle Receiver, the program that lead to the development of the Mk 18) was designed around creating a short-barreled upper receiver for the M4A1 carbine, it isn't inconceivable that one could wind up on the lower of a burst-firing M4 instead.
Tactically loading in a 30-round magazine.
Pulling back the charging handle, using a tactical technique.
Tactically aiming, using the aforementioned high-level tactical "lack-of-sights" method...
...and firing a few bursts. Tactically.
Following a tactical reload so fast and so tactical that it happened before the next screenshot could even capture it, The Operator checks the locked-open bolt of his Mk 18.
He then remedies this, tactically slapping his rifle's bolt release. As with the above M4A1, the Mk 18's bolt release subtly pops out when the bolt locks open.
"What? No! It's not like I need a sight or anything. I can pull 0.5 MOA groups without sights at 300 yards, no problem. But, y'know, it's not like it'd do any harm to attach a magnifier and a holosight..."
"...or two..."
While attaching two holographic sights might seem a bit pointless, there is one distinct advantage in H3: the fact that they can be individually zeroed for separate ranges...
...allows for this. This dual reticle setup is used for quick transitions between ranges; in this case, the smaller, higher reticle (from the front holosight) is zeroed for 50 meters, while the rear holosight's larger, lower reticle is set for a whopping 2.
"Of course I don't need this! My 6 years of tactical operator training have given me the ability to see 20/20 in total darkness! I'm just... doing it... ironically! Yeah, that's it! I'm attaching this flashlight ironically!"
"That's also why I'm attaching this laser! I don't need a laser to aim. I don't even want a laser to aim. I'm just using one for the sake of irony."
"Good, now that he's gone..."
"...I can finally get to business."
Taking full advantage of the currently-loaded Beta-C drum magazine, and sending out a few (dozen) 3-round bursts.
"Ahhh... perfect. Er... wait, no, I mean... uhh... perfect...ly pointless? Haha, yeah, of course! Perfectly pointless! I don't think that this is good or anything, I'm just doing it as a joke! What kind of non-tactical pleb would actually need all this stuff to operate? Am I right? Heh... heh... right?"

SIG SG 550

Added in Update #53, the SIG SG 550 is one of H3's usable assault rifles, and is fitted with a quad-rail handguard and a permanently-attached folding bipod.

SIG SG 550 - 5.6x45mm NATO
Reaching over to fetch an SG 550...
...before taking a good look at it.
Loading in a 30-round magazine. These were added with the rifle, and are fully interchangeable with the 20-rounders from the earlier-added SIG SG 552 below.
"Hey, wanna see a magic trick?"
"Bipoddus extendus!"
Setting the telescoping-legged bipod down on a range booth table.
Aiming through an Aimpoint Micro T1 sight that found its way onto the rifle, along with a vertical foregrip and a few rail covers. Funny how that works, isn't it.
"Oh, so that's why it wasn't working."
"So now it should fire, right?"
"Wrong."
With all of that sorted, the SG 550 can finally do what it was brought here to.
Releasing the locked-back bolt of the 550, now somewhat-redundantly fitted with a set of Magpul's MBUS irons. "Somewhat" being the key word here; the in-game SG 550 has a front sight, but no rear sight to line it up with.
Firing some more shots, whilst looking through the now-attached M145 MGO (Machine Gun Optic)...
...and a few more through a conveniently-present set of canted backup iron sights.

SIG SG 552

The SIG SG 552 is one of the available firearms in-game, and was added in Update #39. Update #46 added a version with additional rails for mounting attachments.

SIG SG 552 - 5.56x45mm
Spotting an SG 552 on a table...
...and picking it up.
Taking a good look at the Commando 552.
The SG's other side, which shows off the charging handle.
Loading in a 20-round magazine. With how quickly it fires, the SG 552 goes through these rather quickly.
Giving the charging handle a pull.
A closeup of the selector, which has options for safe...
...semi-auto...
...three-round burst...
...and full-auto.
Deciding upon the latter, Mr. Invisible takes aim at a target...
...and fires.
After realizing that the note from 8 screenshots ago is, in fact, true, Mr. Invisible performs an AK-esque tactical reload. The specific technique seen here (hitting the magazine release with the new magazine facing sideways, and often going more up than forwards) is common practice in H3, as it minimizes the risk of hitting one's controllers together.
Update #46's rail-equipped version of the SG 552, seen here in an updated version of a familiar setup.

Steyr AUG A3

Rounding out the "Bullpup Trifecta" of the 1st Meatmas update is the Steyr AUG A3. Of note is that the weapon's 2-stage trigger is correctly simulated, something which is very rare in games.

Steyr AUG A3 with optics removed and 16-inch barrel - 5.56x45mm
A look at the left side of the AUG reveals a pretty well-done replica of the real steel. Or rather, real plastic, considering the nature of the majority of the AUG's body.
Loading in a fresh 30-round magazine, which is a solid brown color; the real weapon's magazines are normally translucent.
Pulling back the charging handle...
...and locking it into its notch. This functionality wasn't present on the AUG when it was first added, but it was made possible in Update #52.
Doing this allows for the rather odd use of an "HK Slap" on a weapon that isn't actually made by HK.
"Aiming" the rifle, which immediately reveals a lack of any actual sights.
This, of course, doesn't stop anyone from dumping all the rounds out of the magazine anyway.

Sturmgewehr 44

The famous StG 44 was added to the game in Update #48.

Sturmgewehr 44 - 7.92x33mm Kurz
Taking a good look at the Sturmgewehr's model. Like the rest of the weapons in H3, it is of excellent quality.
The other side of the StG.
Lining up a fresh 30-round magazine of 7.92x33mm Kurz ammunition.
Pulling the Sturmgewehr's charging handle reveals that the dustcover actually pops up. If one so desires, they can manually push it back into place.
Switching off the safety. The fire selector is the button above it, currently pushed to the left for semi-auto. Also note the "MP44" marking above the charging handle slot; this was one of 4 different ways the weapon could've been marked, along with the prior "MP43" or "MP43/1", and the later "StG44" markings.
Aiming the rifle...
...and opening fire.

Rifles, Carbines, & Battle Rifles

Bendix-Hyde 2nd Model Light Rifle

The second version of the Bendix-Hyde Light Rifle, a prototype entered into the US Light Rifle Program trials, was made available in Update #52's 11th alpha build.

Bendix-Hyde Light Rifle (2nd Model) - .30 Carbine
Jamming a magazine into the carbine...
...before taking a good look at its... interesting proportions.
The Hyde's other side, which shows off the charging handle. This was one of the many things changed from the first variant; that one had a non-reciprocating charging handle, which the testing board requested to be changed, citing a need to be able to manually force the bolt closed if necessary.
Speaking of the charging handle, it's high time for it to get pulled.
Turning off the safety, which is a piece inside of the trigger guard, rather reminiscent of the M1 Garand (or, for that matter, the M1 Carbine that defeated the Hyde in trials).
Looking through the Hyde's rear aperture sight...
Firing a shot, thankful that doing so doesn't cause it to transform into a Jekyll Carbine.
"Y'know, just because one of the complaints about the 2nd model was that it was less accurate than the first, does not mean that it's okay to do that."

Beretta Cx4 Storm

The Beretta Cx4 Storm semi-auto carbine is available in-game, added in Update #20; it was, until the release of Update #52, permanently fitted with a foregrip. It is correctly capable of sharing magazines with the Px4 Storm added in the same update, as well as the M9A1 added earlier and the Mx4 Storm added later.

Beretta Cx4 Storm - 9x19mm Parabellum
A Cx4 Storm rests on a table. Not much else to say here.
Loading a magazine into the carbine.
His weapon loaded, Hick-not45 proceeds down range with his Cx4, determined to get a hit on the gong.
He then remembers to pull the charging handle.
Firing the Cx4; the bullet trails demonstrate one of H3's interesting mechanics: the ballistics system. The system assigns a material to every object in the game, and has rounds react accordingly; in this case, the FMJ 9x19mm rounds pierce through this wooden post, and are redirected this way and that in the process.
A close-up shot of the Cx4's foregrip; not only did Update #52 remove this, but it also removed the rail system it's attached to.
With that, Hick-not45 sets the carbine back on the table, and moves on.
The sights of the Cx4, in a far more demure setting.

Brügger & Thomet APC45 Carbine

Update #61 added a pair of Brügger & Thomet APC-series pistol-caliber carbines, one of which is an APC45. This is possibly the APC45's first known appearance in any form of media.

Brügger & Thomet APC45 Carbine - .45 ACP
Brügger & Thomet APC9 SMG - 9x19mm Parabellum. Image provided to show the collapsible stock seen on the in-game APC45.
Loading a magazine into the APC45...
...and pulling the charging handle.
Examining the carbine; note the 2-position fire selector.
The other side, giving a good view of the collapsible stock. While not as commonly seen on the carbines, the collapsible stock is interchangeable with the side-folder, so such a configuration is entirely possible.
Attaching a red-dot sight, in an attempt to appease the benevolent gods of reference images.
Plus it makes aiming easier.
Firing off a round.
Collapsing the stock...
...which fits nice and flush against the back of the receiver.
Doing this allows the APC45 to be used as a pseudo-pistol.
Note the word choice: it allows the APC45 to be used as a pseudo-pistol. It does not make doing so easy.

Brügger & Thomet APC9 Carbine

To compliment the APC45, Update #61 added the more commonly-seen Brügger & Thomet APC9, also in semi-auto carbine form.

Brügger & Thomet APC9 Carbine - 9x19mm Parabellum
Brügger & Thomet APC9 SMG - 9x19mm Parabellum. As above, image provided to show the collapsible stock seen on the in-game APC9.
The left side of the carbine...
...and the right side. Without the magazine, the APC9 is nearly indistinguishable from the .45 version.
Bringing the magazine into the equation makes the difference relatively clear. These 32-round magazines are interchangeable with those of the Brügger & Thomet MP9, which makes sense, considering that they're made by the same company.
Giving the reciprocating charging handle a nice, solid tug.
Fiddling with the collapsible stock.
Flipping up the front sight...
...and the rear one.
The APC9's selector switch; the civilian carbine versions have only safe and semi-auto positions, while the SMG variants have a 3rd full-auto position around the 8 o'clock position relative to the pivot, denoted by 3 red dots (see the 2nd reference image).
The aforementioned semi-auto position.
A view through the carbine's flip-up irons.
Another view of the same, this time just after firing.

Bushmaster ACR

Added in Update #58, the Bushmaster ACR is, unusually for a video game, correctly treated as a civilian semi-auto rifle, rather than the select-fire assault rifle that most games depict it as.

Bushmaster ACR - 5.56x45mm NATO
In an act of defiance against the reference image, our invisible operator loads his ACR with a 30-round USGI-pattern metal STANAG, rather than the image's PMAG.
Plus the game doesn't have any PMAGs yet.
Well, making do is all we can.
Pulling the charging handle; interestingly enough, H3's ACR has its reversible charging handle set on the right side, in an ideal position for a left-handed user.
Taking a close look at the fire selector...
...which has two - count 'em! - settings: safe, and semi-auto.
It also has zero - count 'em! - sights by default.
Once again, there's nothing to do but make do.

Custom AR-15

Update #59's ninth alpha added a custom AR-15 carbine, with a short barrel and PDW-type collapsible stock. Being a civilian rifle, it fires exclusively in semi-auto. Update #61 added another custom AR, this one a full-length rifle, known as the "Bubba-15".

North Eastern Arms NEA-15 PDW - 5.56x45mm NATO. Similar (though not identical) to the rifle in-game.
Admiring the AR. 200 extra dollars and 9+ months of waiting well spent.
Loading in a 10-round magazine, for legality's sake, before irritatedly remembering that most states with magazine capacity restrictions have a total moratorium on SBRs anyway (SBR standing for Short-Barreled Rifle, a term used in the context of US firearms laws to refer to any firearm with a stock and a rifled barrel shorter than 16 in (40.6 cm), or a front-to-back overall length under 26 in (66 cm); under the National Firearms Act of 1934, these require registration with the Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms, and Explosives, with a $200.00 fee, though some states simply prohibit them outright).
"Well, if they're going to come for my dogs, they're going to have to go through me first."
"That might be a problem."
Alleviating the aforementioned problem, by attaching an Aimpoint red-dot sight.
Aiming...
WE ARE EXPERIENCING TECHNICAL DIFFICULTIES; PLEASE STAND BY.
...and firing.
Remembering that funny little thing called "eye relief" exists, our heroic dog-defender extends his rifle's stock.
There we go, much better.
Firing again, this time without any risk of objective lens-related eye injuries.
Dumping out the empty magazine. 10 rounds lasts longer than you might think, but not as long as you'd like it to.

"Bubba-15"

Attempting to stick a magazine into the trigger guard; Bubba isn't known for his hand-eye coordination. After all, he only has one of the latter and one and half of the former.
Still, depth perception isn't needed for drooling over a bronze-coated bolt carrier.
Or any of the rifle's other aftermarket components, for that matter.
Getting back to standard Bubba business, and pulling the charging handle.
Flipping the selector, from "Safe"...
...to "this is still a civilian rifle, what'd you think its fire modes would be".
Extending the stock.
Attempting to aim...
...before remembering that, of course, no expensive rifle is complete without an expensive optic.
There, much better!
Firing the rifle.

CZ 858

The last of Update #59's SA vz. 58 variants is a synthetic-stocked CZ 858 civilian sporter rifle.

CZ 858 with polymer furniture - 7.62x39mm
Looking over the CZ 858.
The rifle's other side. As one might expect, it's more or less the same as the standard vz. 58 from an aesthetic perspective, barring the fire selector and furnishings.
Loading a 10-round magazine into the 858. While thematically appropriate, the 10-rounder isn't the only available option; standard 30-rounders work just fine.
Pulling back the charging handle.
Aiming the rifle... poorly.
Firing the rifle in spite of this fact, with groupings to match.
While there aren't many perks to using a 10-round magazine on a rifle such as this, one among them is the ability to fully top it off with a single stripper clip.
Letting the bolt slam back into battery.

DRD Tactical Paratus P762

Update #58's collection of modern firearms included a DRD Tactical Paratus P762, a Gen 2 model to be exact.

DRD Tactical Paratus P762 (Gen 2) - 7.62x51mm NATO
Admiring the P762. It's got all the bells and whistles, except, y'know, a trigger.
The other side, which shows off a bolt so shiny that it caused the spontaneous appearance of letterboxing.
Loading in a 20-round Magpul PMAG.
Pulling the folding charging handle. This is one of the improvements of the Gen 2 model; the first-generation model has a more traditional round knob instead.
As with many of H3's rail-topped firearms, sights must be attached manually.
Unless that's just not your style.
"Oh? What might this be?"
"Oh, okay."
Unfortunately, mounting the rifle doesn't fix the "lack-of-sights" issue.
At least it helps with the recoil.
And just like that, the gun's empty.
A P762 fitted with a scope and suppressor, serving as an ersatz DMR.
Looking through the rifle's scope at an attacking Turburgert, one of many defending the Pacification Squad's checkpoint. This particular one is of the "Flak" variety (as evidenced by the shotgun-style cluster of projectiles flying towards the screen); there are also standard bullet-firing versions, "Suppressive" versions (which fire a 3-round salvo of flashbang grenades), and flame-throwing versions.

FightLite Raider

The FightLite Raider, a civilian semi-auto AR-15 "pistol" (i.e. legally considered a pistol by US gun laws, but not really a pistol from a technical or logical standpoint) based on Ares' traditionally-stocked SCR lower, makes its media debut in H3's 58th update.

FightLite Raider - 5.56x45mm NATO
Taking a look at the downright bizarre concept that is the Raider.
The right side, which is just as strange as the left.
Loading in a 10-round magazine, for maximum legal compliance.
Pulling back the charging handle; as with the game's other AR variants, the dust cover correctly pops open.
"Aiming"; the top rail can be used to mount irons or optics, but doesn't come with any by default, not that a stockless rifle with the ergonomics of a flintlock pistol is something that one expects terribly good accuracy out of, anyway.
Firing the Raider. Being a short-barreled rifle in every sense except that of the law, the Raider produces a suitably impressive muzzle flash; however, this isn't exactly something that can be captured well in a still frame.
Removing the now-empty magazine; while these drop free from most AR-pattern rifles, the Raider's grip is too far back for the magazine release to be accessible with the firing hand, so the magazine has to be removed manually.
Furthermore, while the bolt does lock back, the Raider doesn't actually have a bolt release.
As such, the bolt must instead be returned to battery with a quick tug of the charging handle.
As if the whole situation wasn't strange enough already, the Raider in-game is compatible with all of the stocks that can be attached to actual handguns, allowing for the creation of odd-looking carbines like this.

FN FAL

Update #54 brought along the much-desired FN FAL battle rifle.

FN FAL "G Series" - 7.62x51mm NATO. Similar to the one in-game.
The right side of the Right Arm of the Free World...
...and the left side.
Loading in a 30-round magazine, of the type more commonly associated with the FAL's support weapon variants, such as the FALO and C2A1. 10- and 20-round magazines are available as well.
Pulling the charging handle.
Flipping the selector off of "S"...
...and onto "R".
Peering through the FAL's distinctive aperture sights.
Firing off a shot.
Remembering something about the FAL that many games tend to forget: the selector has a third position, "A".
"A" for "Awesome". Presumably.

FN SCAR-H

The FN SCAR-H is one of the available firearms in-game, added with the release of Update #32. Upd